Sign, Sign, Everywhere A Troy Parker Sign...

Contributed photo, xoxo, blog post by John Hoff

Hint, hint. The primary was, like, um, AUGUST TENTH.

Linda Higgins won; Troy Parker lost; and here are vote totals, for the record:

Linda 3617 votes 68.69%
Troy 1415 votes 26.87%

Troy would do well to take his signs down and leave a good impression for the next time he runs, which history suggests he certainly will, since he's also lost to Council Member Barb Johnson and, with one more election, will achieve the not-so-coveted status of "perennial also ran."


(Do not click "Read More," but do pick up your toys when political playtime is over)

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Slumlord Bashir Moghul Described As "Neighbor From Hell" In Inver Grove Heights...

Dakota County image used under Fair Comment and Criticism,blog post by John Hoff

Google is so amazing. Several weeks ago, some folks in Inver Grove Heights were getting mighty fed up with their neighbor, one Bashir Moghul who owns a property at 3950 65th St., click here for Dakota County tax information and a parcel map, so cool.

These neighbors decided to seek out information about Bashir Moghul and, naturally, the richest and most detailed source of info--including the only known picture of him online--turned out to be this very blog.

Here's what the nice neighbors in Inver Grove Heights have to say about Bashir...

"He is the neighbor from hell. The house is vacant. The city has spent our tax dollars fighting this guy. He owes back taxes. The city was cutting the grass, but I heard no more. We do not have any housing maintenance code in this city, so this guy gets away with murder. I am sure he has some great excuses to the county judges. It is a very long story with many unhappy neighbors. I sent your blog to our naïve city council and mayor."

JNS blog says: I find it hard to believe it could be true about no housing maintenance code in Inver Grove Heights, and also I have to wonder what the standard is for "neighbor from hell" in your fair city where (I hear tell) most property owners need to have 2.5 acres to erect a house, which makes it certain Inver Grove Heights will be an island of affluence for quite some time to come unless somebody manages to successfully dispute the CONSTITUTIONALITY of that ordinance. Upon such an artificial island of affluence, I assume the standard for "neighbor from hell" is quite low, like having an unbearably orange garage door. (I'm sure few regular readers realized I have strong opinions about zoning issues in Inver Grove Heights. Well, it turns out, I do)

However, clearly this blog has a beef with Bashir, so I'm happy to publicize this matter and promote discussion. Though Bashir has hired attorney Ferdinand Peters and there seem to be promises in the air of Bashir "cleaning up his act," clearly those promises will take a long time to fulfill because Bashir's act is such a mess. This is not the first time I've received word of Bashir's property holdings extending far beyond North Minneapolis; indeed these holdings are reported to extend into other states.

And, everywhere Moghul goes, he leaves slum in his footsteps.

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New Public Art In NoMi (And It Doesn't Even Make You Cringe And Clutch Your Purse!)

Contributed photo, xoxo, blog post by John Hoff

A new mural is taking shape on the side of the 4th Street Saloon Building, and--unlike a lot of other public art in North Minneapolis--it doesn't appear to be a cringe-inducing chaotic celebration of "urban dystopianism" with an overriding anarchistic graffiti motif, such as the...

..."distorted faces" banners which were foisted upon West Broadway by Juxtaposition Arts or (worse case artistic scenario) the "tripping cows" mural on the side of the Kemps Ice Cream factory. No, indeed, this mural appears to be something nice, something North Minneapolis can point to with pride. Johnny Northside Dot Com is excited to see how the mural will continue to take shape in the coming days and weeks.

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(PARODY POST) Black Sheep Of The Friedman Shoes Family Sets Up "Fetish Shoes" At 324 West Broadway...

Contributed photo, xoxo, blog post by John Hoff

(Parody content below)

It is with a truly prurient sense of EXXXCITEMENT that North Minneapolis welcomes the latest business addition to West Broadway: Fetish Shoes, which is tackily tacked onto the end of the "Fourth Street Saloon" building at 324 West Broadway, right across from Wendy's and Taco Bell, just one block over from the Friedman Shoe Store.

The owner of Fetish is reportedly the "kinky little sister" of the Friedman family, who went away to prison for a while due to Penn Ave. N. prostitution charges but she is now out on parole and trying to, er, "follow in the footsteps" of the Friedman family name by opening a speciality shoe store.

The question, of course, is when EXXXACTLY is the store open? The photo above was taken around noon on a Saturday, and the store was closed. Is it a situation of the store being...

...open "by special appointment," kind of like the special appointments to be found (until recently) in the adult section of Craigslist ads?

Too bad, says Johnny Northside Dot Com, that B.J.'s strip club is closing soon, since the strippers could have supported a local business which appears to specialize in, among other things, skanky stilettos.

(Please note that was the parody voice saying "too bad...that B.J.'s strip club is closing soon.")

On another note...

(End of parody voice, here)

I have held off since May in my public criticism of Friedman's Shoes for having such an ugly, trashy exterior due to discolored Plexiglass windows festooned with well-aged stickers. For months, I have swallowed the bile of my public criticisms because of some back channel communications saying Friedman's was involved in making some kind of grant proposal which seemed to include fixing up the windows. Recently, the appearance of "Fetish Shoes" brought the old Friedman's issue to my mind again, and made me wonder, gee, what is going on with THAT? How long have I held off on THAT? Gmail search function says...oh, my word, since FREAKING MAY.

Time to fire off an inquiry. Time to get no reply.

Smolder.

With no answers to my back channel communication hitting my inbox, I fully intend to blast Friedman's with public criticisms quite often, making up for lost time. THE BUTT GLASS LOOKS HORRIBLE. WHY DOESN'T FRIEDMAN'S DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE BUTT GLASS?

You can expect this kind of thing from Slumlord Keith Reitman, but Friedman's is the kind of place which is supposed to have a good name on West Broadway.

What the hell, Friedman's, what the hell?

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Nice Ride Bike Sharing Kiosks Expanding into NoMi

Nice Ride Kiosk in North Loop. Photo by John Hoff

NoMi blog consumers will remember some lengthy discussions and some hurt feelings (rightfully so) that NoMi seemed to be completely forgotten about when the Nice Ride Bike Sharing Program opened shop.


Public officials and northside cycle enthusiasts even sat down with the Nice Ride proprietors and found a way to get a northside kiosk opened at UROC. There's even a video featuring one of the first rides from the UROC kiosk...


Now, Nomi folks can look forward to five new Nice Ride bike kiosks opening around the rest of the northside, although at this time, I don't believe the locations have been determined. It sounds like part of the funding will be used to engage the Northside community and determine the best locations for the future kiosks.


A city council vote that took place yesterday helped distribute some federal stimulus money to help fund the expansion of the bike sharing program. Another giant step forward in the revitalization of NoMi!

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A Harbinger Of Changes To Come? Water Shut Off At 2219 Bryant Ave. N.

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

The house at 2219 Bryant Ave. N., which is near my own house, has been vacant since I arrived a couple years ago. Nothing ever happens there except...

1.) Sometimes the yard needs mowing, but apparently one of the neighbors takes care of this task in a spirit of selfless service. Rarely does anybody need to call 311.

2.) The stupid phone book companies drop off stupid phone books, which is stupid but it gives me a great project to complete with my son during visitation, click here.

Week after week, month after month, and (apparently) year after year, nothing changed at the house. But then one day a few weeks ago, a water shut-off notice appeared. First of all...

...I am surprised to learn water was turned on at the house in the first place. Like, you mean this house has been vacant for a couple years, but somebody has been dutifully paying the water bill this whole time? Who? Why? Looking up the property on the city website reveals it is owned by a Conie Lawler, who doesn't appear to own anything else, certainly not some large slumlord empire.

Seeing the water shut-off notice makes me hope this property will move forward...that it may hit the market, and become occupied by a nice family who will make good neighbors. Or perhaps some slumlord will buy it, and I will make a point, constantly, of publicly shaming the slumlord in every small action taken toward the house. We shall see.

My neighborhood is in the midst of a great transition, which is composed of numerous small changes at thousands of individual properties. Neighbors notice these small changes; they talk and speculate. But what is currently happening to this house, to that house is a stream of information too microscopic for the mainstream media.

Yet when it comes to the network of blogs in North Minneapolis dedicated to revitalization, we watch, we call, WE CARE and we share information.

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JNS BLOG EXCLUSIVE: Somebody At NRRC Reportedly Pulled An "Old Majority" Style Move: Computers Missing, Records Shredded...

Stock photo, missing computer in North Minneapolis, ho hum,blog post by John Hoff

In a development which sounds mysteriously similar to a controversy which happened in the Jordan Neighborhood, click here for one sample story, a reliable source reports secondhand information that computers are missing at the office of NRRC (Northside Residents Redevelopment Council) and office records have been shredded. This incident reportedly happened some time earlier this week. This information is unconfirmed but solid enough by blogosphere standards for publication with the aforementioned caveat included. Johnny Northside Dot Com seeks more information, photos, commentary from anybody in the know and has avoided the publication of any name(s) reportedly associated with this allege incident until and unless more information comes forward, either to this blog or via other media.

NRRC (pronounced like "NERK") is an umbrella-like neighborhood uber-organization which...

...a few years ago, had swallowed up some smaller neighborhood organizations and/or brought those organizations under its influence...specifically, Near North and Willard Hay. However, in recent years the organization had struggled to survive, as documented in this 2007 City Pages article, click here. It sure seems like there was a whole lot of money flowing through NRRC, and not much to show for it.

This recent incident, if true, may be the swan song of an organization which has existed in some form or another since 1968 but, in all likelihood, has been bypassed by more successful, well-managed, and forward-thinking forces of revitalization.

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West Bank's Loss Of Bedlam Theater Could Be NoMi's Gain...

Photos and blog post by John Hoff

Bedlam Theater, which occupies a former restaurant building near the West Bank light rail transit station, will soon be displaced by a mosque. Click here to read the Star Tribune article, and my apologies in advance if the Star Tribune link goes dead--which is why I loathe using Star Tribune links if I can possibly avoid it.

But, to make a short STrib story even shorter: Bedlam is being kicked out of its current space by its landlord, Fine Associates, because expansion of a parking lot near Riverside Plaza is going to leave a mosque homeless, and the mosque needs the space occupied by Bedlam, which only has a month-to-month lease at the former restaurant. The property management company which is displacing the mosque to build a parking lot--and is, therefore, responsible for creating this double layer of suffering by both the homeless mosque and Bedlam Theater--is a name familiar to citizens of North Minneapolis: Sherman Associates, which also runs the notoriously drug infested Hawthorn (sic) Crossings strip mall.

(To be fair, there is some anecdotal evidence Hawthorn [sic] Crossings is improving, lately)

Some weeks ago, while passing through the West Bank, I had a casual sidewalk conversation with one of the many "Bedlamites" involved in Bedlam Theater, to pick up whatever loose talk I could about where Bedlam might relocate, and to point out how welcome Bedlam would be in North Minneapolis...

First, let me say that anybody who never visited Bedlam Theater in its soon-to-be-former location has missed a real treat. There is/was a delightful bar inside, as well as (oh my word) delicious and hearty Polish cuisine. I am told the Polish food is/was a result of somebody involved in Bedlam being very in touch with his Polish heritage. Bedlam utilizes a relatively small creative space, but they pull it off with panache, presenting a variety of artistic and socially-conscious theatrical productions. Don't be fooled by the name "Bedlam." These are nice folks who run a tight ship, and "bedlam" seems to refer only to the madness of their creative process.

But now Bedlam needs to relocate, and what a shame. Prior to Bedlam occupying the long-vacant restaurant space, the West Bank light rail transit station was SCARY AND ISOLATED, so much so I actually wrote an opinion piece about this issue in the Minnesota Daily, back in the days when I was caught up in "dead tree media." But once Bedlam moved into the space next to the transit station and--after a while, in the course of time--began to utilize their roof as bar space--the scary isolation of the transit station went away. Anybody on that light rail platform who emitted a loud scream would have been heard by numerous bar patrons hanging out on the roof, many if not most of them good citizens of the socially conscious variety, as evidenced by the fact that, well, they were hanging out at Bedlam Theater. God only knows how many crimes on that light rail platform never happened because of the mere civilizing presence of Bedlam Theater.

Note the second photo from the top. This is a view of the light rail platform taken from the roof of Bedlam Theater a couple of weeks ago.

Plus, how many thirsty and hungry light rail users found their way inside for food, drink, and the use of bathrooms which, um, eschewed gender specific labels?

Will the mosque make any use of that roof? Or let folks inside to use the restroom? Will the nearby transit station be as safe with Bedlam gone? I somehow doubt all three. But what can you do? It's all the fault of Sherman Associates. Boo. Hiss. Boo. Maybe a certain theater company should write a play about Sherman Associates. Just a thought. But now for the good news:

According to my "sidewalk informant," North Minneapolis is one of the locations being considered by Bedlam Theater.

This is exciting news. Frankly, I hope Bedlam Theater not only relocates to my neighborhood, but I hope they become vested property owners.

(Raising a glass from Dixieland, where work has taken me for the time being)

"To Bedlam in NoMi!"

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