First Amendment Fair Comment and Criticism
The official world record for longest fingernails on a female is 28 feet, 4.5 inches TOTAL, for all ten fingers. An image of the longest fingernails can be found at this link, click here.
There is, however, a woman in North Minneapolis named Diane (last name unknown to this blogger) who has been sighted, repeatedly, with fingernails that appear equal to or possibly exceeding the world record. Photos taken from some distance away have been published, repeatedly, on North Minneapolis Facebook forums but the image above is the first "voluntary" photo coming to this blogger's attention.
Here, word-for-word, is the account provided by a "Facebook journalist" on North Vent...
I asked her lots of questions, but asked if I could first. She was very nice. She said she's grown them for 14 years. Keeps acrylic powder on them to hold the weight and keep them from tearing. Hers are 32 inches. Said the last record was 30 inches. I asked if she has contacted Guinness and she said no, when I asked why, she said she was too ashamed. That took me back for a minute. She said her grand kids paint them. I asked the guy she was with if she gave good back scratches and he laughed and then said nooooo ma'am! I'm still in shock! They are the thickness of a c battery and very bumpy (hell no I didn't touch them!).
The guy said he does everything for her, but I saw her use her knuckle to get a $5 bill from her wallet. Mind blown!
It is the belief of JNS blog that if a world record has fallen, Guinness should be notified and North Minneapolis should get the credit we deserve...
Bizarre and dubious credit though it may be.
The world record for largest ball of twine (made by one man) from Dassel, MN, was unfairly usurped by some town in Texas (which shall remain nameless and ignominious), where the whole town worked together to make their twine ball. If this woman from N Mpls holds the record for longest fingernails, then it must be drawn to the attention of the Guinness Book people. Give crazy its due. Speaking of which, we clearly have the craziest governor.
ReplyDeleteshe gave me the worst HJ i've ever had and then she wouldn't give me my $3 back
ReplyDeleteHow does she.... do ANYTHING?!
ReplyDeleteOh Sure, Why would she want to bring attention to her ignorant grooming standards? People might think she's CRAZY!
ReplyDeleteWhy are we giving accolades to someone who can't do anything for herself because she chose to grow fingernails instead of working to take care of herself? Some of us have no fingernails to speak of because we worked,paid taxes, took care of and independently supported ourselves & our children. Is there any title for us?
ReplyDeleteThanks to YOU, NoMI is known as home of the most sex offenders, pimps, prostitutes, thugs, and slumlords. You have publicly painted NoMi as a ghetto sewer. No wonder property values are in the toilet.
ReplyDeleteDo us all a favor and move to another state.
johnny, the boy who stowed away on the plane is from nomi, get on it!
ReplyDeleteHow does she eat, sleep, or even wipe her ass with fingernails that long? She clearly can't be a productive citizen.
ReplyDeleteHow can she possible get a pan out of the cupboard to cook, drive a car, flush the toilet, put on her clothes? How can she even hold her hands upright with the weight of those nails?
If she is on welfare it has to be the biggest fraud in the country.
Just so you know, every time somebody asks about wiping her ass, the entire North Vent forum has to take a drink. That's the rule.
ReplyDeleteRegarding the stowaway boy, I KNOW IT!!! But I don't have any leads!!!!
ReplyDeleteLet it out, Northside. Tell us how you feel about this. LET IT ALL OUT.
ReplyDeleteI do not care for the "H J" comment but I am approving it due to its thought provoking albeit very off color nature. Clean it up. You won't get so lucky next time.
ReplyDeleteAw get real, Johnny! You know my HJ comment was hilarious. I didn't think it would be a big deal, what with all the strippers, porno and "prolific swallowers of semen" you have been blogging so much about lately.
ReplyDeleteI said clean up the comments. You didn't. Comment rejected.
ReplyDeleteHowever, it is also thought provoking how she cleans that OTHER area, as well.
This is one of her nephews i done seen my auntie cook clean and everything else under the sun
ReplyDeleteWhat does she do for a living and does she receive SNAP (Food Stamps), Section 8 or welfare? That's what people want to know.
ReplyDeleteWOW it's SO sad that you people will get on here and even talk about an elderly woman who has done nothing wrong accept grow her nails to a length that none of us have seen before! I know this woman personally and she is a wonderful productive person! Yes there are things she needs help with but she is VERY independent! What difference does it make if she gets assistance from anywhere other than its something else for you people to talk down on her for... I don't know if she does or not but what I do know is that you guys are VERY petty for some of these comments! Thats someones mother/aunt/sister/ grandmother and for you to talk about her in a bad way because of her nails is wrong... she is very clean, her house is clean, she has good hygiene, her kids were always clean and taken care of but you guys don't care that she raised good kids and had a stable home for them or that she has always been there when her family has needed her and is always quick to help! She started growing her nails as something fun for her to do with her daughters and granddaughters... every season change she would have them paint different things on her nails to go with the seasons!
ReplyDeleteSo you have some knowledge of her being on public assistance despite her self-imposed and bizarre disability?
ReplyDeleteDid you read my post? I said I DON'T KNOW IF SHE IS OR NOT! What does it matter? Look at her... she's WELL into her late 50's, early 60's (women never ask) but guessing... what service can she REALLY do anyway? Smfh... your sad for that! This woman has raised kids that weren't even hers but she loved them and gave them a good life... THAT'S a story! Not whether or not sge was ever on assistance!.you should be ashamed of yourself!
ReplyDeletethat's my cousin... people that talk about her don't know her. She got a man that get out everyday and work to take care of her and public assistance you people that don't have long nails is on public aid.Don't talk about a person you don't know about their situation?
ReplyDeleteI agree. There are many people who are on public assistance who don't have fingernails that approach (or actually reach!) a length such that Guinness Book of World Records needs to be notified. In fact, that description would include ALL the people who are on public assistance in this country, unless there are a few other "fingernail ladies" we don't know about.
ReplyDeleteBut I think my point, and the thoughts of others, is that it's outrageous to grow your fingernails that long like a Mandarin emperor while collecting public assistance. Now then, specifically, what forms of public assistance is she on?
Wow! Amazing nails! I'd like to meet her. I am sure she is a very interesting person! She must be a strong person to endure all the negative comments about her wonderful nails. And yet she must be a very good person and very patient because she must answer to all the questions about her fantastic nails.
ReplyDeleteI hope she will break the world record for the longest fingernails one day!
I am Bill Douglas and she has now an admirer for life!