This Crack House Is Closed For Business

Photo by John Hoff

This is the house which caused me so much concern, because of the little Hmong children living across the street and the handicapped man...

This is the one where I was told, well, they'll get fined $200 and then fined again if they don't do something. So I was told to call the housing inspector and they gave me his number, but I already knew the guy, already had him in my speed dial.

I left an apologetic message. I told him about why this one really concerned me, because of the vulnerable people living across the street. Honestly, I didn't expect anything to happen because of my call. But the next day I came by and, whoah---!

Boarded. Plus an illegal occupancy placard. And--thank goodness somebody is keeping on top of this--NEW PHONE BOOKS TO ADD TO THE FILTHY, MOLDERING PILE OF A DOZEN ALREADY IN THE YARD.

I was pretty happy about this. (No, not the phone books, but the place getting secured)

After I took this picture, I tossed the phone books into the porch where they wouldn't turn into a pile of mush. I'm thinking hard about just recycling them before they get rained on. I actually did recycle a phone book yesterday, but it happened to be one of my own left in a vehicle my brother Judd sold for scrap, removing all my possessions from it first like a solid citizen.

And, gee, he saved my phone book. To taunt me...?

No, actually, it's because he spends nearly all of his life out in the sticks and a Minneapolis phone book actually looks like something of use and value to his bumpkin eyeballs. When we were kids, we used to shoot 'em full of .22 bullets, then dig the rounds out of the pages.