What Should JNS Blog's Latest Blogging Obsession Be? JNS Blog Asks Readers, Rhetorically, But IS THE FIX ALREADY IN?!

Photo from North Talk Facebook forum, blog post by John Hoff

Longtime JNS blog readers are familiar with what happens when JNS blog announces an obsession about an unsightly eyesore in the community.

FIRST, I assign some kind of cruel-but-catchy nickname.

(OK, well, cruel. Catchy happens sometimes, not always)

THEN I won't shut up about the issue until the problem is solved. There is a list of community eyesores this blog has successfully tackled over the years. With the exception of...

Northside Progress Busting Out All Over As Slumlord Keith Reitman's "Blue Twins" Demolished...

Photo by Jeff Skrenes of North By Northside, blog post by John Hoff

Jeff Skrenes of the North by Northside blog was the first to tweet the information (on his NXNS Twitter account) that slumlord Keith Reitman's ugly "blue twins" at 2522 and 2520 Penn Ave. N. were demolished today.

Watch North by Northside blog in the next day or so for video and other information about the demolition.

The ugly "blue twins" were historic buildings which still had some potential until slumlord Keith Reitman neglected them into the landfill. Readers will recall Reitman's "blue twins" were the "winner, winner chicken dinner" of this blog's contest to determine what should Johnny Northside's next obsessive blogging target be.

With the blue twins now reduced to splinters and rubble, I will be announcing a new contest in the near future. Readers and fans are urged to put on your thinking caps in regard to which North Minneapolis livability issue is the most deserving of this blog's highly-focused, creative and critical attention.

Slumlord Keith Reitman Came Off As "Arrogant" During Child Falls From Slummy Window Court Proceedings...

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Slumlord Keith Reitman is the "winner, winner, chicken dinner" of the Johnny Northside obsessive blogging project, as previously announced, due to his sad and neglected "blue twin" houses on Penn Ave. N.

But this morning I had to ask myself, "Have I been giving our winner, winner all the bloggy chicken dinner he deserves? What have I done for Keith Reitman lately? More importantly, what do I HAVE on Keith Reitman, lately?"

That's when I remembered an email from Stacy Shaffer, whose small son received a settlement from Reitman after falling from a window...

WINNER, WINNER, CHICKEN DINNER! Slumlord Keith Reitman's Sad, Decaying "Blue Twins" Take First Place In The "What Should Johnny's Next Obsessive Blogging Project Be?" Contest!

Photo by Hawthorne Hawkman, blog post by John Hoff

So right after I left Ghazni Province in Afghanistan and arrived at Bagram Air Force Base...a paradise of internet access and mocha lattes, the only downside being five incoming fire alerts five nights in a row and sleeping in a big tent with, like, 100 other men...I learned about Friedman's Shoe Store caving in to my bloggy pressure campaign (they say they didn't, WHATEVER) and actually fixing up their unsightly glass. So the next logical question was...


...where to focus my harsh, burning light of blogospheric attention and criticism NEXT? Who is the most deserving? Where are results needed most? Where could such attention actually get results?

Well, I'm pleased to announce that after much thought, and input both public and behind the scenes, plus a vision in which Reitman appeared to me and said, "Johnny, Johnny, why are you persecuting me?" I've decided...

(Drum roll, please)

(Oh, wait, you already know from the headline)

Our winner is "Level Three Slum Offender" Keith Reitman, whose "blue sisters" at 26th and Penn were falling to ruin BEFORE the tornado, are falling to ruin more AFTER the tornado, have official paper slapped all over them, sit right in the heart of an area desperately needing development, had historic potential once but it's rotted away like unharvested fruit, are the ultimate example of the bastard color known as "Reitman Blue," are only the foremost of MANY examples of scumoidal slumlordery by the aforementioned Reitman, plus I have a really good photo to use as an illustration, so that pretty much bags it.

Congratulations, Keith Reitman. Oh, what fun First Amendment attention you can expect until this eyesore is resolved. Maybe a blues song about the "blue sisters?" Maybe one North Minneapolis "revitalizer" after another posing in front of the properties (on the oh-so-public sidewalk) and holding their noses?

Maybe...here, fill in the blank. Let your imagination work overtime, Keith.

But all in good time. For now, click here to enjoy this video of "paint drumming" by the Blue Man Group.

Is this how the color "Reitman blue" is produced?