Fat Lady Warming Up To Sing In "True JACC" Court Case...

Creative stock photo, FOB Gardez, Afghanistan, blog post by John Hoff

This blog previously reported on the "hard to watch legal enema" when attorney Jill Clark went before the State Court of Appeals in the "True JACC" court case, an endless legal wrangle spawned when decent people were voted into seats on the Jordan Area Community Council and one of their first acts was to fire JACC Executive Director Jerry Moore for punching a board member the night before. 

Now, according to a reliable source behind-the-scenes...

Last Desperate, Pathetic, Choking Gasps Of The "True JACC" Legal Appeal As Attorney Jill Clark Whines For Delay On Account Of Illness...

Stock photo (Hennepin County Government Center) and blog post by John Hoff

The "True JACC" lawsuit which was fought over who was the legitimate governing board of the Jordan Area Community Council was concluded quite a while ago, and yet that worn out old tire still has some tread left on it.

After the Honorable Judge Charles Porter ruled the plaintiffs in that action brought "some or all" of the lawsuit "not in good faith," an appeal was filed (Court of Appeals No. A11-1198) and the case that never seemed to end...still never seemed to end.

But now the sad, desperate, "not in good faith" little legal action might be winding down to an anti-climactic conclusion...


It took a long time for a copy of the Appelants' Motion to make its way to me here in Afghanistan along with used shoes for Afghans and chocolate covered expresso beans for the nights I pull sentry duty, but make its way to me it surely did. In the motion of September 27, 2011, Jill Clark begs piteously for more time on the basis of two factors:

1.) She's still waiting for a ruling on a motion requiring her clients to purchase an additional transcript. (To which I say: Yes, transcripts are expensive, but you mean to tell me that FIFTEEN INDIVIDUAL PLAINTIFFS can't manage to come up with enough jack to just purchase a transcript? I guess it's not so easy to come up with money when you don't have a neighborhood organization to financially rape, and I say "financially rape" based on the results of the forensic audit)

2.) Dog ate my homework.

OK, I'm kidding. Clark emphatically cites some unknown medical condition which has laid her up, and caused her to have "surgery." The oh-so-mysterious malady isn't named, leading one to wonder (maddeningly) what on earth could it be?

Clark is a self-admitted alcoholic, who even published a maudlin musical album called Songs For A Recovering Planet. Clearly, however, there isn't any sort of surgery available for being a boozehound.

The mystery deepens.

Lacking any ability to transform the documents in question to a PDF, it will be necessary for me to reproduce the text wholesale, along with occasional caustic remarks like, for example, when Clark mentions her "staff" that would probably include the "chat line rapist" who (at least as of the date of the JACC trial) worked in her office.

The word "para" replaces "paragraph symbol" in original text. Boldface and italics have not been replicated.

Ready? You might need ear plugs for this, there's some pretty serious whining...

APPELLANTS' MOTION TO EXPAND TIME TO FILE BRIEF AND MOTION FOR ORAL ARGUMENT

MOTION

Respondents filed a motion in the trial court seeking to require Appellants to purchase additional transcript. The Trial Court has not yet ruled on that motion.

(JNS says: "Respondents" means the other side of this appeal, i.e. the side that won and doesn't need to appeal, specifically the "New Majority" board members of JACC that included, for example, Michael "Kip" Browne. The Appellants in this action are the loooooooosers, which would be Jill Clark's clients who sued over control of JACC. So when you see "Respondent(s)," mentally substitute "winners." When you see "Appellant(s), mentally substitute "loooooosers.")

Further, Appellant counsel has encountered medical issues and has had to be on medical leave, which will continue (but hopefully come to an end soon).

FACTUAL STATEMENT

District Court yet to rule on defense motion for more transcript

On August 9, 2011, the Honorable Charles A. Porter heard oral argument on the Defendants' motion to require plaintiff-appellants to purchase additional transcript for thsi (sic) appeal. (Clark Aff. para 2) Appellant counsel's office has not received any ruling from Judge Porter on that motion. (Id.) See also the Register of Actions at Clark Aff. Exh. 1.

(JNS says: THE DOG, esteemed members of the Appeals Court! A big, vicious, bitey dog with teeth like the gates of Hell that went chomp, chomp, CHOMP and there went Algebra! English! Scared Straight Teen Challenge Class For Boozehounds! The aforementioned dog or dog-like creature--it may have been a wolf!!!--clamped down his mighty jaws and with shakes of its head did rend, rip, TEAR the homework in question!)

(But oh!!! As though this was not horror enough!!! Contrary to all laws of nutrition and the expected behavior of dogs as opposed to, inter alia, GOATS, the fearsome creature proceeded to wolf down--I say again, WOLF DOWN--my homework, even pausing to take its long, pink tongue and lap up every papery scrap! Not only do I seek an extension for the completion of my homework but, my goodness, MEDICAL LEAVE for post traumatic dog-eating-homework stress disorder!)

Appellant counsel medical leave

In early September, Appellant counsel went out on medical leave, which was extended. Although Appellant counsel returned to work part-time, she was unable to work a full week last week due to issues. Yesterday, Monday, September 26, 2011, the plan was for Appellant counsel to be in the office part-time.

(JNS says: WHY ARE YOU PUTTING A HYPHEN IN "PART TIME"? CRIPES!!!!!)

However, an unanticipated medical emergency caused Appellant counsel to leave the office to seek immediate medical care. By the time that was concluded, she was unable to work any more that day (and staff had left).

(JNS says: Presumably at least ONE of the staff went home to brood over his dark, utterly unfulfilled sexual fantasies)

Appellant counsel is now scheduled for surgery on Friday, September 2011. (Sic) The occurrences yesterday could not be anticipated: with deep apologies to the Court, Appellant counsel was simply unable to draft a brief yesterday, or even a motion to expand, or a motion to restore oral argument. (Clark Aff. para 3)

(JNS says: I'm all confused by the use of the term "medical leave." Isn't Clark in practice by herself? Especially with her "partner in crime" Jill M. Waite suspended. So who would be the authority to grant this "medical leave" other than Clark herself? And, in that case, can't she grant it any time she wants?)

ARGUMENT

Appellants originally requested, by motion, until October 15, 2011 to file their brief in this action, due to the district court not having ruled upon the defendant-respondents' motion to require plaintiff-appellants to order additional transcript. This Court granted the motion, but only extended the time to brief until September 26, 2011. Although Appellants greatly appreciates (sic) the extension of time to file brief, the Register of Actions for the district court case shows the motion for more transcript to be "under advisement." If this Court would like the Appellants to brief this appeal before the district court has ruled on the issue of whether the plaintiff-appellants should be required to purchase additional transcript, please let us know.

Appellant counsel apologizes to the Court for any inconvenience.

(JNS asks: where is your apology to the DEFENDANTS for all the cost and inconvenience caused by an action the district court ruled wasn't even brought in good faith?)

(We now return to Appellant's gripping explanation of how the dog ate her homework)

Just before leaving the office for medical leave, Appellant counsel drafted a number of motions for extensions of time. She had already drafted the motion for more time in this appeal (citing that the district court had not ruled), so in a desire to get those motions out the door that final day of work, she did not add in any details in this case about her medical leave.

(JNS says, Translation: Yes, I attended a full day of school after the morning of the dog-eating-homework incident and I said NOTHING about the incident, but that was to avoid inconveniencing my teachers, thinking I could somehow RECONSTRUCT the homework in a timely fashion. Now, finding the loss of the homework to the dog overwhelming, I am compelled to tell you these alleged and purported facts)

Obviously, the leave occurred, and was extended.

(JNS says: How is that "obvious?" Where is the evidence other than your say-so?)

Appellant counsel's staff worked diligently to file all prepared documents in a timely manner, but there were days that Appellant counsel was not available to monitor that filing (and those days were not anticipated). It was for the reason that the motion to extend was filed one day after the date the brief would have been due if the trigger was the already-filed transcript. (Clark Aff. para 4) It would appear, now, that it would be important to resolve the issue of whether the district court is going to order the purchase by Appellants of additional transcript.

(JNS asks: How does whether or not another transcript needs to be purchased have ANYTHING to do with the arguments you need to make in your brief? You may as well tell the court you need a delay until it's determined whether somebody can validate your parking outside the court house, one is as relevant as the other. Furthermore, since the piece of crap you filed was ruled "not in good faith" by the district judge, is there even any DOUBT about which way the ruling will go about whether your clients need to pay for that transcript? Also, I would tend to think the long, dark shadow of "not in good faith" extends even to the arguments in this motion, counselor, particularly when those arguments bear a "separated at birth" resemblance to "dog ate my homework.")

Further, it is the understanding of Appellant counsel from the hearing on this issue, below, that the defendant-respondents intend to file a motion with the Court of Appeals if they are not successful below. (Clark Aff. para 2) It appears that there was no actual delay in the appeal due to the filing of the first motion to extend. Pursuant to Minn.R.Civ.App.P. 134.01, Appellant seeks reconsideration of the striking of oral arguments for this appeal. This is a case where Appellants believe the Panel would benefit from oral argument.

(JNS asks: Would that be "not in good faith" oral argument like the case itself? I tell ya, if the court isn't even interested in hearing oral argument, that says a lot about which way it's going to go)

Appellant counsel's medical emergency of yesterday was not anticipated. As much planning as possible has occurred with regard to the medical leave. But as a solo practitioner (whose staff are working overtime to accommodate the medical leave), sometimes there is no one else to do the work.

(JNS says: And let's not forget how Jill M. Waite, who was the other half of "the two Jills," has been suspended from the practice of law. Heck, I saw a case just the other day where Jill Clark was acting as Jill M. Waite's attorney! More on THAT later. But maybe a lawyer involved in solo practice should be prudent and not take on so much work, particularly when the cases are of such a cuckoo clock nature that no other attorney would pick up that ball should it happen to get dropped)

By the time Appellant counsel was done with her medical appointment and was able to turn her attention to this motion to extend, staff was gone, and Appellant counsel was unable to work.

(JNS says: I was all alone, the only sign of another living presence being the muddy tracks of the dog that ate my homework, which were washed away by my bitter tears before I could take a picture for evidence!)

With deep apologies to the Court, this simply could not have been anticipated.

(JNS says: Could the fact the lawsuit you're trying to appeal was filed "not in good faith" have been anticipated? Could this be an example of the legal principal "karmus et un bitchum"?)

Appellant counsel has now been scheduled for surgery, and hopes that after a brief recovery she will be able to work full time. (See Clark Aff.).

(JNS says: Biting. My. Tongue.)

Conclusion

Appellants respectfully request until October 15, 2011 to file their Opening Brief as they do not know when the district court will rule, and it appears that Respondents would also file a motion on that topic at the Court of Appeals Level.

(JNS says: Jill signs the document with her psychotic "drooping tumor" abstract signature which bears no relation whatsoever to the name "Jill Clark.")

Clark's affidavit in this case is more of the same dog-versus-homework b.s., except some of the b.s. is worded differently, as follows:

I am now scheduled for surgery on Friday, September 30 for surgery. (Sic) I apologize, but I was unable to draft a brief, or motion to expand, or motion for oral argument yesterday once I returned from the medical provider. I am hopeful that with this final diagnosis, that the surgery will clear up the remaining medical issues and I will be back at work full time in the near future. In this timeframe, however, my ability to draft large documents has been impaired.

(JNS says: We've seen your large documents. How much more "impaired" could you possibly be?)

Appellants do seek oral argument in this case.

(JNS says: If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride)

Appellants should not be penalized for my medical leave.

(JNS asks: Should they be penalized for not filing in good faith?)

The medical emergency of yesterday was not anticipated, and although I anticipated needing to request an additional extension of time to file brief (not just due to the medical leave, but also because the district court has not yet ruled on the transcript motion), I assumed I could easily draft that second motion to extend in half a day.

(JNS says: the medical emergency was YESTERDAY, and you wrote all this crap TODAY, and yet there's a bunch of OTHER crap you just weren't capable of writing? Oh, you can write SHORT crap, but you just can't write LONG crap. Uh huh. What did this dog look like, again?)

I just did not anticipate what befell me, or my inability to be productive after medical care.

(JNS says: Your definition of "productive" leaves much to be desired in the eyes of the defendants against whom you filed this "not in good faith" action)

I have done my best to address all deadlines while on leave, but on certain days this was simply not possible.
.........................................
JNS says: What? The chat line rapist couldn't help you draft stuff?

I did go and check the online court records and found there were orders in this case dated October 12 and October 19. These orders may pertain to the issue of whether defendants have to pony up for another transcript.

Also, it appears the defendants in this case each share a judgment of $15,000 plus $40,887.37, for a whopping total of $55,887.37. This is the thorny end of the primrose path that Clark led her clients down, and now she's all, like, oh I'm sick--! I can't do very much--! Don't blame my clients--!

Well, perhaps the clients should blame CLARK. What competent attorney brings a case which causes the court to say, "This case was not even brought in good faith"?

And so it appears the fat lady has not yet sung, but she is puttering around with the pages of her sheet music, and taking some deep breaths.

Stay tuned. No other blog or media entity has documented this "Northside neighborhood sea change" lawsuit like the Johnny Northside blog, no other blog has paid so steep a price. This blog was there at the beginning, this blog will be there at the bitter, apocalyptic end.

Mug Shot For Murderer Edgar Barrientos (Ben Myers Was His Attorney)

DOC mug shot, therefore public domain, blog post by John Hoff

It was only a kind of fluke that Edgar Barrientos received coverage here on Johnny Northside Dot Com, click here. His murder trial happened during the "true JACC" court case which revolved around who, exactly, was the legitimate leadership of the Jordan Area Community Council.

NOT Ben Myers, as it turned out. At the time, Ben Myers was involved in the JACC controversy and was also one of the defense attorneys for Edgar Barrientos. So, in the course of covering the JACC drama at the courthouse, I also watched a portion of the Barrientos trial.

Life would be so much easier if the mug shots of DOC inmates just naturally made their way to Google search engines. But, instead, somebody like me has to say, "Check it out, Edgar Barrientos' mug shot is finally up."

(Do Not Click "Read More")

Neighbors Complain About 2615 Logan Ave. N., Owned By Former JACC Board Member Ben Myers...

Photo, blog post by John Hoff

Once upon a time, criminal defense attorney Ben Myers was a big man in North Minneapolis, holding an officer position in the Jordan Area Community Council (JACC) and throwing his political weight around.

However, Myers and others were ousted as officers from JACC after a dramatic "sea change" neighborhood election, (followed by a fistfight in the basement of a church, followed by JACC records whisked away in the dead of night) the consequences of which continue to reverberate to this day.

It was right around the time Myers and the other "old majority" members of JACC lost their "who is the true JACC" court case that it seemed like Myers started to make himself really scarce in the old neighborhood.

Now Myers owes a judgment from the failed "true JACC" lawsuit that followed his ouster and the appeal of that lawsuit is not going very well. (More on that later) A couple days ago I was cc'ed on an email to 311 with a "laundry list" of complaints about Ben Myers' property at 2615 Logan Ave. N., which city records (admittedly often out-of-date) state is owned by Ben Myers of 14834 Kelleher Ct, Savage, Minnesota.

Here's the list of what one neighbor North Minneapolis neighbor would like to see fixed at 2615 Logan Ave. N...


1. fix the gutter on the garage
2. fix the roof on the garage
3. paint the chipping trim on the garage
4. replace the rotting wood on the garage
5. remove the "shopping cart" full of garbage from the back of the house
6. remove the garbage and construction debris surronding the "shopping cart"
7. remove the brick from the back yard
8. remove the construction debris from the south side of the house
9. fix the broken fence
10. fix the broken fence door
11. REGISTER AS A VACANT/BOARDED HOUSE AND PAY THE $6,000 REGISTRATION FEE!!!!

The email in question was sent to 311 on November 5. However, only three days earlier on November 2 (according to the city property record) the building was boarded.

What a sad and ignominious end to the reign of Ben Myers.

Judge Porter Amends The Old Majority Costs, Fees and Disbursments Order

Contributed Images, Blog Post by Nomi Passenger (click on images for larger view)

Last week Johnny Northside shared the news of a $15,000 court order in the Old v. New Majority JACC lawsuit.

This week we learn that Judge Porter has amended that monetary order and upped the judgement amount owed by the plaintiffs to $40,887.37

For all you English majors out there, that's a total of $40,887.37 owed by fifteen plaintiffs equals only $2,725.83 each. It's such a small amount for each of the plaintiffs to sponsor two years worth of entertaining blog posts here on Johnny Northside Dot Com cough up quickly and easily. Let's get this baby tucked away in the crib once and for all.

The unsuccessful legal actions were brought against the JACC organization after a handful of Jordan neighbors and their non-Jordan friends or relatives caught a bad case of sour grapes when they lost their majority control of the organization following the annual election meeting in January 2009. The highlights, or low-lights might be more accurate, include then Executive Director Jerry Moore throwing punches and pushes after the election meeting; an unforced entry break-in of the JACC office in which computers, equipment and records went missing; circulation of an announcement that JACC had been forced to relocate due to the current events (assuming this meant a different majority gained control); a dramatic open press conference featuring Mayor of Crazytown and Lunatic-at-Large Al Flowers losing the small amount of self control he was pretending to have have had and shouting, screaming and pushing Councilman Don Samuels (his loss of decorum earned him a personal escort by MPD's finest; and the low-lights continue on with two years of court actions pursued by the unsuccessful Old Majority Plaintiffs and their attorney, the infamous Jill Clark who has become well known as the go-to attorney for criminals and offenders who want to launch an offense as the best course for what really is their course of defense.

Here's a summary, in no particular order, of the 15 plaintiffs that according to Judge Porter, have acted in a manner not in good faith, and who now owe $2,725.83 each(note the following contains some factual writing and some inserted opinion commentary from the author based on direct interaction and insider knowledge):

Jerry Moore: former Executive Director of JACC, mortgage fraud consultant to Keith Reitman in the infamous 1564 Hillside Ave deal, and current employee of The Neighborhood H.U.B. located in the basement of Christ English Lutheran Church at Penn and Lowry.

Ben Myers a.k.a Benjamin Myers: self-employed attorney at Dejvongsa and Myers Law Firm and currently in need of updating his profile page on his website which lists him as the Vice Chair of JACC from 2008 to present, this hasn't been true for over 2 years now; formerly lived on Logan Ave North but now residing in the leafy suburb of Savage, MN. Just for a fun little something for the readers' minds to chew on, here is his own quote from his law firm profile page: “I’m strategic and thoughtful. I look at all the angles—both the obvious legal issues as well as the underlying and subtle issues. If the prosecution’s case is questionable, I’m ready to take your case to trial. However, if negotiating a just resolution is in your best interest I will not hesitate to accomplish your objective(s). I will do whatever it takes to get you the best result possible. You can always trust in me and this office for an aggressive defense in every case.”

Ethylon Brown: a rather sweet and gentle woman who was, in my opinion, misused in some one's, or several people's, quest for power and control. This woman's naivety was probably taken advantage of and if I am wrong than this lady is quite the slick deceptive character. She is last known to work at River of Life Church in some kind of rehab program and she lives just doors down from the JACC house in Jordan.

Robert Scott a.k.a Bob Scott: Bob served as the JACC treasurer for a while and did not have an easy go round on the JACC board, probably thanks to being put in the hot seat by other's who were not completely legitimate with the money and the books, but Bob was completely closed off to hearing from the broader community and sat idly by as the organization's pocketbook spiraled out of his control. At one point he resigned from the board so it was surprising to see him listed as a plaintiff. I believe Bob had been involved with the organization many, many years ago and I believe it is Queen Avenue, near Lowry, where he has lived for many decades.

Shannon Hartfiel: Shannon served some of her board term as Secretary and seemed to have a special place in her heart for Executive Director Jerry Moore. Shannon is a long time employee of Minneapolis Public Housing and lives near the Jordan Pond, in the higher blocks of Logan Avenue. Shannon can be heard on the Jordan Livability video footage of the JACC press conference when she tells off the crowd and then storms out. In my opinion she was never that great at getting her point across, I'm still not sure what she was so upset about that caused her to make a big dramatic exit. She did that several times now that I think of it. If I had to place a wager on the plaintiff that has the most regret and remorse for getting involved in this mess, it might be Shannon that I bet on. I think she falls into the category of having the wool so far over her eyes and then seeing the most light when reality finally struck. Shannon, am I right?

Robert Wilson: Robert held a seat on the JACC board for about two cycles, which equals about four years. He was always a quiet and very modest participant. Presenting himself as a faithful church goer and family man. He didn't take on much actual lifting work of the organization, just seemed to keep a seat warm at board meetings.I believe he lived or still lives on the higher end of Fremont or Girard, not sure. He always felt somewhat mysterious and reminded me sharply of a 70s era silent protester for the black power movement. Perhaps someone with an afro and a black turtle neck who just stood silently in protest or a sit in. To me, that was Robert Wilson.

William Brown: The only thing I know about this plaintiff is that he is the husband of Ethylon Brown, so he jumped in supporting the old majority through the election cycle and subsequent meetings and disputes. Together, him and his wife owe JACC a total of $5,451.65. That's gotta hurt the household budget.

Dokor Dejvongsa: Dokor is the life partner and law firm partner of above listed plaintiff Benjamin Myers. To me, she is the brains AND the beauty behind this dynamic duo and that's not saying much.  I fear she carries a tremendous amount of burden and pressure resulting from her double partnership. But, nonetheless, she is an extremely bright woman who for whatever unknown reason thought her actions, along with others, were the right course of actions and for that mistake she can scribble out a check for $2,725.83 and if Ben is really lucky, maybe she'll cover his share, too. I'm sure a law firm check will work, just make sure your accounting ledger is accurate.

Steve Jackson: Steve is a northsider for life and he'll proudly remind you so with such things as a faux football jersey that says NFL Northside For Life. Steve has worked at the Boys and Girls club for what feels like forever and it's unclear if Steve still lives in Jordan. He was seen at the most recent JACC Annual Meeting in October 2010 in which he seemed to try to make some kind of amends with some of the folks although, from what I could overhear, his apology lacked some integrity and he might need to work on that a little bit to regain some ground with fellow community members that have been put through the ringer by these 15 plaintiffs. But Steve will be around and he'll be soliciting donations for basketball jerseys, that you can count on.

DeEtte Davis: DeEtte is one of several plaintiffs that really had no business being a plaintiff, except of course that it is her Founding Fathers given right to be one. She never was really involved in JACC, didn't have any history with the organization and I would imagine was not presented with a realistic version of events and situations. She lived on Logan Avenue not far from Ben and Dokor and not far from several of the defendants and supporters of the New Majority. This made for awkward run-ins around the Jordan Pond area where neighbors tend to "meet over the fence" so to speak, without the fence. DeEtte is a very outgoing, friendly and gregarious personality, often times taking on the burden of confronting law-breakers such as suspected drug dealers or prostitutes because she claimed to have come from the streets and a life of crime herself so she felt she could connect with them. I don't know where DeEtte is living these days, but hopefully it is somewhere affordable, so she can help cover her share of the $55K court order.

Tamara Hardy: I am not sure that anyone actually knows who Tamara Hardy is. She never participated in JACC although she did attempt to run on the ballot in October 2008 and again in January 2009 in the postponed elections. If I remember correctly she did not prove her eligibility to be on the ballot, or if she did, she didn't show up for the elections and was subsequently not elected. I think she is another one of those buddy-pals of Jerry Moore and I would venture to say she was probably not realistically informed of everything. If that is the case, maybe she can talk her buddy Jerry Moore into covering her portion of the costs. It's worth a try, Tamara, but if not, you've got plenty of good company with whom to wallow in your beer.

Lafayette Butler: I believe this woman is the daughter of Ethylon Brown. So kind of like William Brown, above, she jumped in to support her Mom when the disputes arose. It is unknown, by me anyways, where Ms. Butler lives and if it is even in Jordan. She wasn't a real active participant in JACC and she hasn't been around since the legal action started, which is the case for all the plaintiffs. I gotta admire the loyalty here in this Brown-Butler family. I just wish they'd taken a closer look at the bigger picture. But they didn't. And for that, Judge Porter says they each owe $2,725.

Jernell McLane: This plaintiff is a rather interesting one, in my opinion. It's my opinion that this person never did actually live in Jordan during the October 2008 to March 2009 time frame. Like Tamara Hardy, above, she was someone who was recruited by Jerry Moore to run for election to the board, but who failed to prove that she was eligible to be on the board. And another interesting tidbit, she was also one of the disputed delegates in the infamous credentials battle for the Ward 5 DFL caucus and endorsing convention. I can't remember off the top of my head if she was determined eligible to vote as a delegate or not. I remember seeing her with a super cute baby in a stroller. Maybe her and Tamara can team up together and force Jerry Moore to pay their $2,725 portion of the judgement.

Frank Essien: Owner of Essien Sports Apparel. I met Frank at the January 17, 2009 open press conference held at the JACC house. The press conference was called to allow the new majority leaders that opportunity to publicly claim valid victory in the elections as well as openly dispute the circulations being put out by the Old Majority in which they claimed that JACC had moved locations. I talked with Frank for a bit and tried to fill him in on some of the background and who's who. He listened intently and if I remember correctly we exchanged phone numbers and chatted once or twice to further discuss the JACC problems. I think I tried to connect him with Kip Browne and Don Samuels, but I don't know if he ever made those connections. I was quite surprised when I saw his name as a plaintiff and I gave him a call to ask him about it. I remember him saying that he did not sign on anything as a plaintiff in a lawsuit but he did tell Steve Jackson "he could use my name as a supporter" or something to that effect. I wonder how this all plays out for Frank now. Does Frank write a check for $2,725 or does he tell Jill and the other 14 that he never signed on to begin with. Interesting, interesting.

Kenya Weathers: Last but not least Mr. Kenya Weathers a.k.a puffy jacket guy. Kenya became known as the guy wearing the puffy jacket at the JACC press conference but that is about all that anyone knew of him. He was at the contentious board meeting on January 14, 2009 and he certainly advocated hard for his support of the old majority folks. I don't think anyone really knew where or if he even lived in Jordan. I think I've seen his facebook page with some pretty radical postings there. Describing him as militant would be more than accurate in my opinion. Go, Kenya, go with your militant self. Go all the way to the bank and withdraw $2,725 to cover your share of the attorney's fees and court costs. I bet it will all fit in your puffy jacket pockets.

As always, readers are encouraged to share their commentary and knowledge in the completely anonymous comments section. 


*this blog post was updated and corrected to reflect a total judgment amount of $40,887 which is hardly anything when you remember that JACC's D&O insurance provider, Traveler's, spent over $200,000 to defend these legal actions which Judge Porter opined were brought in bad faith.

JNS BLOG EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS: Controversial JACC Press Conference At Issue In Alfred Flowers vs. Don Samuels...

Photos and blog post by John Hoff

Look at the top photo. Look to the right. That's the hand of notorious loon-at-large Al Flowers and it's holding a live camera. Kip Browne, who is in front of the camera, recalled under oath that it was a "video camera" being held by Flowers. If so, why was this tape never introduced as evidence by the plaintiff in Alfred Flowers vs. Don Samuels? What does the tape show about the actions of Al Flowers? Even if the camera was, in fact, shooting still photos...where are they? The fact Flowers was recording with a camera is also documented, extensively, in latter portions of the "Goodmundson video," click here, for example at 5 minutes, 30 seconds.

Video tape, 911 audio, eyewitness testimony, still photos, all of these things were examined in the Alfred Flowers vs. Don Samuels "toe stepping trial," which this blog has covered in more detail than any other media entity, click here for an example.

In light of this extensive legal and historical examination of precisely what happened at that press conference...and particularly in light of such odd side issues such as "did Al Flowers have a video camera?" and "what happened between Farheen Hakeem and Council Member Don Samuels?" I thought it would be good to take all the photos I shot that day and just put them on the internet for the record. After observing the trial, I realize my small stock of photos (which were never introduced as evidence) contain some valuable insights.

First of all...

...there were, admittedly, two photos I'm not publishing in this sequence: 1 photo of a black file cabinet, and 1 photo of the messy desk where a JACC computer had been sitting which was (and still is) missing. Those photos have been published before on this blog. In fact, I've even used these images as stock photos. They add nothing to the press conference images and were taken before the conference began. But for the sake of the record: I shot two photographs of FURNITURE before the photo at the top.

Michael "Kip" Browne reading a prepared statement. He has not yet been interrupted by Al Flowers.
This image, above, was snapped right after Flowers shoved Samuels twice. I moved into this position after the shoving. I saw the whole shoving incident clearly, but NOT from this angle, rather from an angle to the right of this photo. I fully expected police to arrive because the unprovoked shoving was so clear and so many people saw it. I had my camera out because I thought more shoving might happen but in the photo above the camera was "too close to see."
Steve Jackson near Al Flowers. The head of Dokor Dejvongsa ("DD") appears in front of Al FLowers.
Al going on about something. What? He lives in Jordan? (No he doesn't) Don Samuels can be seen standing in front of Flowers, PJ Hubbard is to the left. Flowers' jacket appears darker in this photo than previous photos because the flash of my camera made the material on the jacket appear lighter. You can compare with the photo above and see it's clearly Al Flowers. The fur-lined parka is worn by Sherman Patterson, aide to Mayor Ryback.
PJ Hubbard to the left, Don Allen in the back, Al Flowers doing his wide gestures while Don Samuels stands peacefully in the front. Steve Jackson getting in the face of Don Samuels when, really, it's Al Flowers who needs the talking to. Part of "Patterson's parka" is visible to the right.
Don Samuels talking to Farheen Hakeem. You can see how calm Don is and how emotional Farheen is getting. What did Don say to Farheen? Something like: you ran for public office. You were a promising young lady. Now you associate with marginal people and with crazies. Harsh words. Farheen needed to hear those words, but it's doubtful the words will have much impact. Instead of disassociating herself from "marginal people and crazies" Farheen just drives further into the dark, disorderly streets of Crazy Town.

Al Flowers in background, turned away from camera. PJ Hubbard to the left.
Farheen is really emotionally revved up in this photo. Don doesn't agree with what she's saying, but he's obviously calm. In the background, Steve Jackson talks to Al Flowers and Ben Myers is also talking to Flowers while making a hand gesture. Don Allen looks on.

Steve Jackson in the foreground, Al Flowers to the left, Kenya Weathers (previously called "Puffy Jacket guy" at the JACC board meeting where the old officers were ousted) and Ben Myers holding his nose.
After the police arrived and hauled Al Flowers outside, lots of folks ran out to see what was happening. I had my camera above my head, trying to aim and capture what was happening. This photo only got the top of PJ Hubbard's head, (foreground) and Farheen Hakeem in front of PJ. I think the guy in the black jacket is the husband of E.B. Brown.

This photo does capture the fact that Farheen jumped right in the jostle of people at the door. She wasn't all, like, "Oh, oh, don't touch me." Farheen appears to pull out her whole "oh, oh, don't touch me, for I am Muslim and don't like to be touched" in an opportunistic manner.
Pointing my camera toward the door. Just beyond the door, the back of Al Flowers and the top of a police officer's shaven head are just barely visible. The women turned with her mouth open is "Bertha" something. She is a fifth ward DFL politico who lives in the Lynn Park neighborhood of North Minneapolis. The person with the black hat to the left is believed to be Al McFarlane of Insight News. To the right, you can see Megan Goodmundson pointing her camera out the door. It is believed the tall guy in the middle is Sherman Patterson, but he is no longer wearing his parka.
Al Flowers being hauled away by police. Ben Myers is proclaiming himself Al's attorney. Steve Jackson is at the side of Al Flowers. Kenya Weathers follows near. E.B. Brown's husband hands to the back.
Up close and personal with the police.
Still up close and personal. Why wasn't Al Flowers charged with a crime? Now that the trial in federal court is over, why isn't Al Flowers being charged with a crime?
Myers talks to the police. Al Flowers is off to the right near another police officer. The hand on Al Flowers doesn't appear to be Flowers' hand, but possibly that of a police officer. Blowing up the photo, I can actually see a wedding band on the hand. What did that officer tell his wife that night about his day? It's times like this I want to make a point of repeating the mantra of the forces of revitalization: GOD BLESS THE FOURTH PRECINCT.
Myers and others look on as Jackson discusses something with two police officers, while Flowers is present.
I kept waiting for the "money shot" of Flowers being handcuffed and hauled away in a squad car. It never happens.
Back inside the press conference: "DD" is talking to Browne. Slumlord Keith Reitman, unshaven as usual, is to the left. The jacket of Zack Metoyer is visible above Reitman.
Browne making a point. Alexandra and Tyrone Jaramillo are in the background. Dan Rother is over Browne's shoulder. With Flowers gone, a vital community discussion manages to finally take place. The issue of "I got four people who says you're illegal" wasn't being hidden: the press conference was held to address these very issues. The court system saw the rightness in the "New Majority" JACC position all the way. Al Flowers, with his anachronistic shouts of "Black power!" is an actual hindrance to social progress in a diverse neighborhood that--Old and New Majority--voted overwhelmingly for Obama.
In the foreground, in glasses, Anna Pratt, a freelance journalist. The woman behind Pratt may be Jules Inda, the wife of Pat Carney who took a number of photos at the JACC press conference, but identification is uncertain. Dokor Dejvongsa sits with paperwork next to notorious slumlord Keith Reitman. Zack Metoyer stands in a brown leather jacket. Batman (Flowers) is being assailed by his enemies, why isn't Robin (Metoyer) out there helping?
Lisa Mitchell of the Hawthorne Neighborhood sits next to Barb Johnson, City Council president. In the back, in red, is Georgianna Yantos.
Now I'm back outside again wondering if Flowers is going to be arrested, finally. Flowers looks very unhappy about something Ben Myers is saying.
Back inside, people manage to have a question-and-answer session. The events of the press conference wind down. Even the assault might very well have been forgiven and forgotten, but then Al Flowers had to sue the man he shoved. The question still hangs in the air: where are the logical consequences for this outrageous behavior?

Al Flowers Loses In Federal Court Today, Details To Follow...

Blog post and photo by John Hoff

A federal court jury of nine men and women, good and true, returned a verdict at approximately 4:05 PM today, finding that Council Member Don Samuels DID NOT violate the civil rights of notorious loon-at-large Alfred "Al" Flowers, nor assault Flowers.

The same jury did find...

Don Samuels was acting in his capacity as a public official ("under color of law") but for purposes of the verdict it did not matter, since Don Samuels DID NOT assault Al Flowers by backing up to Flowers and stepping on Flowers' toes in violation of Al Flowers First Amendment rights. (Flowers states his big toes both lack toenails, ewww)

Testimony by Ben Myers and his law partner, Dokor Dejvongsa, that Council Member Don Samuels had deliberately stepped on the feet of Al Flowers was apparently found NOT CREDITABLE by the jury, surprise surprise. The trial relied heavily on two video tapes which captured the incident, albeit from imperfect angles, as well as four 911 calls made after Flowers twice shoved Don Samuels from behind. On one of the calls, Flowers could be clearly heard heard in the background raving like a madman as Jordan resident Vladimir Monroe summoned police.

Al Flowers and his attorney, Jill Clark, were not present at the reading of the verdict. City Attorney James A. Moore was present.

Many, many more details to follow in future blog posts.

(PARODY POST) My Twin Brother Ben Myers Finally "Settles Up" With Defendant Megan Goodmundson...

Blog post and photo by John Hoff

(Portions of this paragraph below are parody)

My twin brother Ben Myers--who was separated at birth, but just kept coming back no matter how many times our Big Mama Sweetums would dump him off at the orphanage in Texas--recently "settled up" with Jordan residents Megan Goodmundson, Anne McCandless, and Denny Wagner for attorney fees in his failed and (let's just be frank, here) stupid and ill-conceived defamation lawsuit. The lawsuit (like so many others) came out of bare-knuckle Jordan Neighborhood politics and was filed by attorney Kristi McNeilly, quite a piece of work herself.

(Portion below is not parody)

At least one complaint is pending with the Office of Lawyers Professional Responsibility over the failed lawsuit. The Office recently wrote to Megan Goodmundson to explain their delay in moving forward on the complaint against Benjamin Myers and Kristi McNeilly, saying as follows:

June 8, 2010

...

Re: Complaint against Kristi McNeilly and Benjamin Myers
Minnesota Attorneys.
Our Case Nos. 27037 and 27026

Dear Ms. Goodmundson,

The above matter has been pending in this Office since August 2008. We are writing at this time to explain our delay in concluding this matter.

Following our receipt of your complaint...

...we received additional, unrelated complaints against Ms. McNeilly and Mr. Myers. Because it is the policy of this Office to, whenever feasible, resolve all complaints against an individual lawyer at the same time and as part of the same disposition, we have deferred final resolution of your complaint until we can complete investigation of the other complaints against Ms. McNeilly and Mr. Myers and can determine appropriate disposition for all the complaints. Please be assured that we are working as expeditiously as possible to complete our investigation and to conclude this matter.

(The letter goes on to thank Ms. Goodmundson--who has been waiting nearly two years for her complaint to be resolved--for her patience)

In the meantime, the three defendants in Ben's defamation lawsuit finally got some of their money back, each receiving a check for a whopping $545. According to Goodmundson, each defendant actually spent something like $2200 to defend themselves in the lawsuit. More money was spent just to collect money from Ben Myers, but this was a case of "it's the principal of the thing."

Here's how the money breaks down, according to a June 16 document from attorney Ferdinand Peters.

Total amount received (from Ben Myers) $3,000.
Less attorney fees (for Ferdinand Peters) $1,200.
Additional costs--court reporter fee, garnishment fee, motion for attorney fees--$165.
Total due to cluents: $1,635.
Distribution to each client: $545.

(Portions of the post below are parody)

The photo above shows Megan Goodmundson holding her check for $545 which--I would like to point out--she promptly loaned me so I could fix my piece-of-crap vehicle with the bizarre left-handed ignition. Hey, it's not like my brother Ben Myers would ever loan me the money. Not with a check I could actually take to the bank, anyway.

So, folks might be wondering where, exactly, Ben scraped up that $3,000? Well, here's what happened. The mother I share with Ben Myers had a neighbor in the trailer court who shared many things with "Big Mama Sweetums," including an abject addiction to Nyquil mixed with Night Train and the occasional gardening tool. After a bad fall on the front steps late one Friday night, the neighbor wasn't able to hobble around so good anymore, but somehow Big Mama Sweetums managed to finagle a caretaker position from the state, and got paid good money to do the kind of stuff she was already doing for free: play endless games of gin rummy with the neighbor, and drive her around to the store.

Despite Mama Sweetums' tender albeit completely unskilled and at times inebriated caretaker efforts, the neighbor continued to go downhill. And then one day they just found her dead under the trailer house with a whole bunch of other creepy stuff like used needles, dead cat skeletons and a rusty firearm the police had been seeking since, oh my word, the late 1970s. Truthfully, she'd probably been dead a few months longer than the state checks had been arriving, but nobody seemed to make a big deal about it and, somehow, Mama Sweetums ended up owning the trailer through a purported will written on looseleaf notebook paper. Quite a document it was, too, like "here's a list of things I want you to buy at the store" and then, in a sentence scrunched in just above the signature, in slightly dubious handwriting, "Oh, also, this is my final will and testament and I will (Big Mama Sweetums) my trailer house and all the stuff inside, including the contents of the liquor cabinet."

But it worked, and you can't argue with success, but too bad that lawyerly success gene wasn't passed on to Ben.

So--to nobody's surprise, really--Mama Sweetums rented out the second trailer and became a minor slumlord. But this was right around the time Ben was needing $3,000 to pay off his ill-conceived lawsuit. As usual, he asked Mama Sweetums for the money and, as usual, she threatened him with a restraining order.

However, Ben knows all the hiding places in Mama's trailer or--if he doesn't quite know ALL of them--it isn't a very big trailer, so given an hour or two of opportunity to ransack while Mama Sweetums was hanging out at the Holy Roller pot luck dinner, Ben found $2,855.81 worth of squirreled away slumlord proceeds, plus half a dozen jars of coins which Mama had "inherited" from her dead neighbor and was dying to spend on pull tabs and bingo. Oh, Mama was furious when she found Ben's handwritten IOU duct taped to the gas stove. But what was she going to do? Call the police? It's not like Ben wouldn't file a defamation lawsuit against his own mother and, really, what PROOF was there of the money being in the house or even being stolen since Ben left her an IOU and it's his word against hers?

(Then again--and it's kind of a conspiracy theory, I know--part of me thinks Mama loaned that money to Ben willingly but just told me a different story because I've told her SO MANY TIMES not to be loaning her hard-earned money to my worthless fraternal twin half-brother. Who ransacks a trailer but then leaves an IOU? I'm sorry, Mom, but aspects of your story don't exactly hold together)

On a final editorial note...

(and this part is no longer in parody font, I'm dead serious, here)

How can citizens of Minnesota be expected to wait TWO YEARS for lawyer discipline to be resolved and/or dished out? And in the meantime the lawyer is doing his/her thing, possibly creating yet more problems and entanglements for other defendants or the lawyer's own clients? This maddening issue with Ben Myers and Kristi McNeilly is ripe for resolution and I want to advocate strongly for it to be (finally, at long last) appropriately resolved.

Motion To Dismiss In (Baseless And Frivolous) Defamation Lawsuit Against CRA Chair Donald Bellfield...

Stock photo and blog post by John Hoff

CRA Chair Donald Bellfield, who was slapped with a defamation lawsuit so frivolous that (in my humble opinion) it could have been conceived by notoriously frivolous litigant "Spanky" Pete Rickmyer, may finally get some relief on June 23, 8 a.m. courtroom number 759 in the Hennepin County Government Center. A hearing will take place on a Motion To Dismiss, click here for the document. One can reasonably expect many of the same characters who starred in the Dolan reappointment hearing to make an appearance. Disruptive potty-mouths should be aware the kind of behavior tolerated in City Council chambers will NOT be allowed in court.

Word is that attorney Ferdinand "Ferd" Peters is representing Bellfield--the same attorney who represented North Minneapolis activist Megan Goodmundson, and others, against a fruitless "defamation" lawsuit filed by attorney Ben Myers, whose "Old Majority" lawsuit against the Jordan Area Community Council also failed miserably. Ferd appears to be developing something of a specialty in defending pointless defamation lawsuits.

Hopefully the defendants in this matter will make an effort to recoup their attorney fees.

(Do not click "Read More")

Legal Funeral For "Old Majority" In The Jordan Neighborhood--The Fat Lady Didn't Sing, But It's Still Over

Stock photo and blog post by John Hoff

Cinco De Mayo was even happier than usual in the Jordan Neighborhood, as word came of the long-awaited resolution of the "Old Majority" vs. "New Majority" lawsuit, in which some ousted members of JACC ("Old Majority") brought an ill-conceived lawsuit to court following their un-election in board elections and much-deserved replacement by the pro-city, pro-revitalization, anti-thug hugging "New Majority" faction, at that time led by Kip Browne and Ann McCandless.

(As of today, the Jordan Neighborhood is arguably in the "New And Improved New Majority" phase, due to having board elections yet again)

Johnny Northside Dot Com has reported on this Jordan neighborhood controversy more than any other media entity, from the ouster of the old JACC officers, to the shocking theft of equipment and records, to day-by-day accounts of the court proceedings, (including Peter "Spanky Pete" Rickmyer being removed from the court room) to the Old Majority beating a humiliating retreat and not even showing up at their own legal funeral.

Now, at long last, cruel fate comes down like the dark, crusty blade of an executioner's axe. Cue the music. It's time to hear the fat lady singing the strains of O! Fortuna!

Here's a link to the PDF of the Judge's order, click here.

Read 'em and weep.

I talked to one of the movers and shakers in Jordan who gave me some commentary on the order, as follows...

First of all, this is a medical textbook case of "I told you so." From Day One, the leaders of the New Majority faction--folks like Kip Browne and Anne McCandless--were saying "You don't get to just run to court." This lawsuit was ill-conceived, badly revised, and ill-executed. It was the legal equivalent of running with scissors. Well, looks like somebody tripped, fell, and stabbed oneself.

In this case, the order keeps referencing the "derivative claims" issue which means, basically, "Which entity has the right to bring the claim?" Looks like it sure wasn't the Old Majority!Ouch. Dead in the water on the issue of STANDING? Somebody didn't do enough legal homework. Doing a lawsuit when you don't have STANDING is like trying to drive a car without CAR KEYS. I guess it happens from time to time...mostly to drunk people. At least such a put-it-down-it's-lame lawsuit made everything relatively easy for the judge and, let's face it, after sitting through all those days of testimony in a lawsuit which turned out to be PRETTY MUCH STUPID AND POINTLESS, Judge Porter deserved a break.

In court rulings, judges tend to dispose of claims by the easiest route, just like you might take your trash to your back alley by the shortest, easiest route and not go all the way around the block. So if there is a question of lack of jurisdiction (like "Spanky" Pete Rickmyer's so-called lawsuit against me, which he has not yet managed to serve) or a question of standing or the statute of limitations or any other easy way to dispose of the case, a court will tend to dispose of the case that way. Here, "derivative claims" presented an easy route to junk something which was clearly junk. The "Old Majority" should have tried to work things through with the board, not just dashed to court with a lawsuit. JACC should have been given an opportunity to figure out how to resolve their own issues. Oh, and the plaintiffs had their opportunity to participate by running for election. They chose not to.

At least they have a better idea when they will win an ELECTION versus a LAWSUIT.

As the court put it so well--I'm paraphrasing, here--the subjective perception of futility is NOT the legal standard for bypassing one's duty to try to resolve stuff outside the courts, through the administrative systems which are already in place.

Oh! The legal batter hits the lawsuit ball and it's going...it's going...it's gone, it's out of the park, and the New Majority is triumphantly running the bases. Picture them running the bases and scoring at home plate: Kip Browne, Anne McCandless, Tyrone Jaramillo, the whole cast and crew of the New Majority.

TAKE A BOW, New Majority, TAKE A BOW.

As for the Old Majority...

Too bad, so sad, and when will Ben Myers be removing the stuff on his website where he calls himself the JACC Vice Chair? I checked a few minutes ago. That junk is still there. Is Ben going to correct his website before somebody files a complaint with the Minnesota State Lawyers Responsibility Board? I kind of doubt it.

Oh, by the way, this court order would tend to show that when the Johnny Northside blog reported on the stunning lack of merit in the Old Majority's legal case, that reporting was (how shall I put it?) closer to CRYSTAL PURE OBJECTIVITY than the Old Majority had the self-knowledge to candidly admit. The court order talks about UNCLEAN HANDS. Who has those unclean hands? Well, exactly who you'd expect.

How did the hands get dirty? Well, for starters, from PUNCHING A BOARD MEMBER.

Shame, shame, shame.

Despite the ease of the legal ruling, (direct and derivative claims) the order contains EXTENSIVE findings of fact. And guess what? If there's an appeal, all the findings of fact are what the plaintiff is stuck with. You can't dispute on appeal what's been found to be fact in the ruling of the lower court.

An appeal? Ha. Good luck with that.

All in all, Cinco De Mayo was a perfect day for this ruling to hit the streets, because win or lose it was TIME TO DRINK LIKE A FISH.

I propose a toast! To a new day in North Minneapolis, led by a New Majority.

(Blogging from Athens, Georgia, named after Athena, Goddess of Wisdom)

Mail Piles Up, Utility Shut Off Notices, And Where Is My Brother Ben Myers? (Parody Post)

Contributed photos, blog post by John Hoff

(This post contains parody)

(Correction to image directly above: No, Center Point Energy, we don't actually MISS Ben Myers)

Regular readers of this blog are aware of my complicated and intense relationship with "public figure" Ben Myers, who is both my paternal twin and half brother by our mutual mother, "Big Mama Sweetums." When he was quite young, Mama dropped Ben off at an orphanage in Texas. But Ben somehow found his way back, through a female "outlaw trucker" he met Lord knows how.

We all ended up in North Minneapolis, though Big Mama eventually went back to the double wide trailer house in Texas. But who knows how long THAT will last? Ben pawned Mama's trailer house to pay a judgment in a lawsuit.

(This following part is NOT parody)

In recently weeks, none of the Jordan Neighborhood movers and shakers had seen Ben for a while and...

It seemed like nobody was at Ben's house, located at 2615 Logan Ave. N., not far from the almost-famous Jordan Pond.

The folks in that area (the good ones, anyway) keep things pretty tight in the neighborhood, keeping an eye on houses inside a fairly wide perimeter. The fact Ben apparently wasn't at his house much didn't concern folks too much--after all, it's Public Figure Ben "Save Big Stop" Myers, and who wants him around, anyway, after the crap he pulled on the Jordan Area Community Council in the bad old "Old Majority" days?--but when a little utility flags appeared in the yard and a certain envelope from Center Point Energy hit the door, folks on the Jordan Pond couldn't help but notice Ben was really, really absent.

It was suggested somebody should call 911 for a "health and welfare check" on Ben Myers' residence. After all, there had been that incident on July 4 with a body found inside a house, and that house was actually within earshot of Ben's house. But who cared about Ben enough to make the call?

(Back to parody)

It was suggested everybody draw lots, but we'd used all the straws mixing up "Kip and Johnnys," which consists of Jagermeiser and Green Tea/Ginger Ale. I would have been perfectly willing to use used straws, but Kip Browne was all, like, "Dude, that's been in your MOUTH." I was all, like, sorry but you KNOW how I was raised.

Everybody agreed I should be the one to make the call, mostly because it was FUNNIER THAT WAY. I called Big Mama Sweetums first, and explained how one of the neighbors had approached the house under the city's "Keep An Eye On Vacant Houses Mandate" and noted a big pile of unopened mail.

I asked Mama if she'd heard anything from Ben or received any word from him. She said somebody had broken into her trailer and seemed to know right where the stash of "original flavor" Nyquil was located, and she'd blamed kids in the neighborhood, but (in retrospect) maybe it was Ben, because (just like Ben does) the thief had made a "sammich" for himself and left out a bunch of the mayo packets which Mama always liberates from fast food joints.

Well, not just mayo, but any condiment, really, and--ironically--hundreds of bendy straws which I could have really used that evening in North Minneapolis so we could have actually drawn straws, instead of just having the "911 for a health and welfare check" task dumped on good ol' Johnny Northside.

Did I mention Mama also drags along gallon jug and fills it with blackberry flavor sweetened ice tea from the beverage machine at White Castle? Well, she does.

Heavy sigh. I was going to have to be the one to make the call. I should get one of those "We Watch, We Call" signs and wear it around my NECK or, better yet, I could use a t-shirt like that. Some folks say "Stop Snitching." To that I want to add: yeah, dude, the cell phone minutes ALONE really add up.

I kind of hoped my own dear sweet Nyquil-addicted mother could get me out of the snithcing task, by telling me to uphold the family code and NOT call the police on my brother. But instead of telling me to say nothing, and hope Ben would turn up after an 11-day drunk in Mexico (again) here's what our dear mother said about Ben's disappearance:

"That son-of-a-biscuit with gravy owes me BIG TIME. See if the police will let you go through his pile of mail, and if you find any money or checks, send 'em to me. And keep an eye out for any of my jewelry. Oh, and my bread machine!"

Calling the police on my brother Ben was hard. Mostly because the battery was so low on my cell phone, and I didn't have the cord, so I had to look all over for the cord. So it was hard. The police wanted to know what Ben looked like, and I gave a description of his cocky smile, which matches his eyes. I was forced to explain how nobody in a certain high-profile neighborhood social circle had seen Ben for "a while," which translated into about a month when the officer on the phone pressed for more detail.

(The police questioned me BRUTALLY. Where was Dave Bicking when I needed him?)

Though not seeing Ben for a few weeks wasn't particularly worrisome--after all, Ben just wasn't very popular with certain folks--A MONTH was a long time.

And the mail. Let's not forget the mail. Ben is a lawyer, and lawyers are trained to be very responsible and oriented toward paperwork. What kind of lawyer lets mail pile up like that? Maybe nothing was wrong but (I explained) finding a body on the Fourth of July taught folks on the Jordan Pond a lesson. When mail piles up where it's not supposed to, it's time to ask some pointed questions.

As of today, a neighbor informs me the notice from Center Point Energy is missing from the door. We wait, we wonder what is happening to Ben. Did he go to another state (such as Texas) to become a lawyer elsewhere, since maybe things aren't going so well in North Minneapolis? (I mean, just judging from the pile of mail...these are not the habits of somebody whose life is going WELL)

Not only do "We Watch, We Call" but "We Wait, We Wonder"...we mostly wonder about the fate of that sweet little house, which is not such a bad house, really, even though Ben lived there.

Moments ago, even as I wrote this blog post, a Jordan resident texted me at my unknown, secure location (where serving me with Pete the Pedophile's paperwork would be pretty difficult) to inform me the notice from Center Point Energy is missing form Ben's front door. Unknown about whether the pile of mail has been resolved.

Good folks in the neighborhood can use this thread to discuss the alien abduction situation with Ben Myers. Or Ben can get on here and answer for himself.

MOM SAYS SHE KNOWS YOU HAVE THE BREAD MACHINE, BEN.

Give me mom's bread machine and I'll lay off you for a month or so. I already told Mama how you said "the double wide trailer matches her ass." Just wait until she sees it on the deposition tape, which I am ABSOLUTELY SALIVATING to get my hands upon and post right here.

You know and I know there's a lot more sibling dirt where THAT came from, Ben. It's Easter, for God's sake.

ISN'T IT TIME TO FINALLY DO WHAT IS RIGHT?

(Missing JACC paperwork and Blackberry, cough cough)

A&E "The First 48" Featured Minneapolis Murderer Edgar Barrientos...

Stock photo by John Hoff

Convicted murderer Edgar Barrientos has at least one North Minneapolis connection: one of his lawyers was Ben Myers, who was so involved in the messy, pointless "Old Majority" attempt to retain power in the Jordan Area Community Council, (JACC) a matter extensively reported (and sometimes parodied) on this blog.

In the course of the "Old Majority" court trial, this blog reported on the concurrent murder trial of Barrientos and the composition of the jury which--like practically every jury in Hennepin County--looks like an Apple Valley PTA meeting.

Indicted criminals in Hennepin County should desperately seek a plea bargain.

I'm just saying.

Anyway, recently, an episode of of the television program "The First 48" (click for their website) featured Edgar Barrientos and gave an inside look at how Barrientos was singled out as the prime suspect in a Minneapolis murder. The episode may have been a re-run, but I'd never seen it before.

I knew the Minneapolis police were good at solving murders. I didn't realize this particular murder had been solved so quickly or, for that matter, how it was the subject of a gripping documentary.

Keep up the great work, MPD!

(As for Ben Myers--Ben, you continue to suck)

(Do not click "Read More")