Years Of Litigation For Slumlord Keith Reitman, Here Are Some Details...

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Keith Reitman, a well-known North Minneapolis slumlord who was involved in the infamously fraudulent sale of 1564 Hillside Ave. N., has a long history of being involved in litigation. How long is that history? Well, print out this blog post on paper, lay the paper end-to-end, and tell me if Reitman's litigation history is longer than your arm.

Be sure to recycle the paper.

To be fair, Keith Reitman will tell you he was an innocent victim of the 1564 Hillside Ave. N. swindle. But to be even MORE fair, you have to wonder how this "innocent victim" managed to sell that crappy house for so much money, yet still call himself a victim.

What I would call "fair" would be for all of Reitman's profits from that deal to end up in the hands of the true victim: John Foster, a decent man whose identity and credit rating were stolen to make the deal possible. That would be the BEGINNING of fairness. Then, to continue in the spirit of fairness, one must consider pain and suffering and punitive damages. Then we get somewhere NEAR the land of "fair."

But I digress. I digress because it's very difficult to even MENTION Keith Reitman without bringing up the notoriously fraudulent "1564" deal. But this is not a blog post about THAT. Instead, I would like to highlight the long litigation history of Keith Reitman, which can be pulled up through Minnesota's online court records. Minor commentary about some of the cases can be found in my parenthetical comments...

It is believed but not 100 percent confirmed that all of these cases involve the same well-known Keith Reitman who holds a seat on the JACC board, but didn't show up at the last regularly-scheduled JACC meeting.

27-CV-83-007336 REITMAN,KEITH,DAVID VS REALTY WORLD-CALHOUN
11/09/1983
- Hennepin Civil
Pierce, Delila F.
Contract
Closed

(Ah, here we have the earliest example of Reitman litigation. A transplant from Chicago, Reitman came to Minneapolis and built an impressive slumlord empire. What kind of life did he lead in Chicago? I don't have the answer to that question)


27-CV-85-011794 PELTIER,VIRGINIA,M VS REITMAN,KEITH,DAVID
07/16/1985
- Hennepin Civil
Pierce, Delila F.
Contract
Closed

27-CV-TC-000010257 REITMAN,KEITH,DAVID VS COUNTY OF HENNEPIN
05/02/1990
- Hennepin Civil
Tax Court
Closed

(Please note, this case above was some kind of "tax court" dispute)

27-CV-91-008669 MINNEAPOLIS COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT A VS PELTIER,VIRGINIA,M
05/08/1991
- Hennepin Civil
Wieland, Lucy A.
Contract
Closed

(Though Reitman's name does not appear above, he was apparently one of the parties)


27-CV-HC-960517514 REITMAN, KEITH VS HALL, TIMOTHY GLENN
05/17/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

(It's not unusual for a landlord to evict a renter. There are numerous cases like the one above, and most of them aren't particularly notable. The sheer VOLUME may be notable, but who can say whether Reitman evicts more or less renters than MOST slumlords?)


27-CV-HC-960607514 REITMAN, KEITH VS WILLIAMS, STEPHANIE
06/07/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-960703607 REITMAN, KEITH VS REED, ARRON
07/03/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-960816529 REITMAN, KEITH VS REED, ARRON
08/16/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-960917528 REITMAN, KEITH VS TRIGG, TAMORA
09/17/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-961002617 REITMAN, KEITH VS TRIGG, MARSHA
10/02/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-961106515 REITMAN, KEITH VS REED, LISA
11/06/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-961202530 REITMAN, KEITH VS ANDREWS, JUDITH
12/02/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-961211506 REITMAN, KEITH VS MADISON, CARMEN
12/11/1996
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-CD-000002439 MINNEAPOLIS COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT VS GERDIN,DALE,E
12/30/1996
- Hennepin Civil
Danielson, Andrew W.
Condemnation
Closed

(Oh, some kind of condemnation proceeding which doesn't name Reitman, but Reitman is involved. Wonder what piece of property THAT was about?)

27-CV-HC-970207528 REITMAN, KEITH VS SMITH, ANTOINETTE
02/07/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-970207529 REITMAN, KEITH VS MCCRANEY, KAREN
02/07/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-970721517 REITMAN, KEITH VS BROWN, TEALE
07/21/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-970801517 REITMAN, KEITH VS BLACKMAN, JOHN G
08/01/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-970822514 REITMAN, KEITH VS WEGNER, PETREE LATANA
08/22/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed


27-CV-HC-970822515 KEITH REITMAN VS RICHARD P GREEN
08/22/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-970908560 REITMAN, KEITH VS BROWNING, GEORGIA
09/08/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-970916515 REITMAN, KEITH VS DIXON, KERVIN BERNARD
09/16/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-971015512 KEITH REITMAN VS ALICE WILLIAMSON; BERYL BOLES
10/15/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-971209519 REITMAN, KEITH VS JOELSON, BRUCE J.
12/09/1997
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-980313535 REITMAN, KEITH VS DOE, JOHN
03/13/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

(One suspects this was a case involving a squatter)

27-CV-HC-980326510 REITMAN, KEITH VS OVERS, CAROLINE
03/26/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-980408582 REITMAN, KEITH VS LEIKAS, JUNE
04/08/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

(This name is familiar. It's the mother of murder victim Annshalike Hamilton, a case which this blog has written about extensively. The murder is still unsolved)

27-CV-HC-980624520 REITMAN, KEITH VS BUTLER, WINSTON D.
06/24/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-980706506 REITMAN, KEITH VS STANLEY, KELLEY
07/06/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-981102520 REITMAN, KEITH VS JONES, MICHEAL
11/02/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-981216508 REITMAN, KEITH VS LATHON, DELITHA
12/16/1998
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-990616525 REITMAN, KEITH VS SUTTA, MARGARET RUTH
06/16/1999
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-99-016181 MCCLAINE,DANIEL, VS REITMAN,KEITH,
11/05/1999
- Hennepin Civil
Alton, Ann Leslie
Personal Injury
Closed

27-CV-HC-991116538 KEITH REITMAN VS JAMES HENRY BRIGGS JR; RUTHIE P LIVINGSTON; ALSO KNOWN AS RUTHIE P BRIGGS
11/16/1999
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-991116539 KEITH REITMAN VS KATHY LORRAINE NEWMAN; JOHN DOE
11/16/1999
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-991221522 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS LATANYA SLEDGE
12/21/1999
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

(Ah, here we have mention of the elusive James Lang. This name comes up in association with the fraudulent transaction at 1564 Hillside Ave. N., on the seller's side of the table. In several cases below, James Lang comes up again. It appears Lang was some kind of business partner of Reitman)

27-CV-HC-991221526 KEITH REITMAN VS JAMES BRIGGS; RUTHIE BRIGGS; ALSO KNOWN AS RUTHIE LIVINGSTON
12/21/1999
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-000207526 KEITH REITMAN VS DELITHA LATHON
02/07/2000
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-00-0310067 JAMES H BRIGGS JR vs KEITH REITMAN
03/10/2000
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation - Housing
Closed

(Oh, somebody suing REITMAN in housing court. The tables are turned!)

27-CV-HC-000315517 KEITH REITMAN VS DELITHA LATHAN
03/15/2000
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-000405506 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS LOLITA WALKER; MICHAEL WALKER
04/05/2000
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-000405507 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS TAYNIA WAINWRIGHT; ALSO KNOWN AS TAYNIA GREEN; JOHN GREEN
04/05/2000
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-000405511 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS MICHAEL RUSSELL
04/05/2000
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-000823534 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS TINA DAWSON; TILIYIA DAWSON
08/23/2000
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-00-1219038 WARNING LITES OF MINNESOTA INC vs KEITH REITMAN
12/19/2000
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

(What on earth was "Warning Lites of Minnesota" suing Reitman about? A local address comes up with this business: 4700 Lyndale Ave. N. The business is also involved in making a number of minor political contributions)

27-CV-HC-010206530 KEITH REITMAN VS TAYNESHEA ANDREWS
02/06/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010307516 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS LATANYA SLEDGE
03/07/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010309536 KEITH REITMAN VS VICTOR GLEPLAY
03/09/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010309537 KEITH REITMAN VS MIRANDA COLLINS
03/09/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-01-003986 WARNING LITES OF MINNESOTA INC PLAINTIFF VS KEITH REITMAN DEFENDANT
03/26/2001
- Hennepin Civil
Transcript Judgment
Closed

(Here's the "Warning Lites" thing again)

27-CV-HC-010611516 KEITH REITMAN VS HENRY BREEDLOVE; JASON BREEDLOVE; SHERRIE BREEDLOVE
06/11/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010705503 KEITH REITMAN VS CONNIE RAE BUTTERFLY; JOHN DOE; MARY DOE
07/05/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010829509 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS MICHAEL RUSSELL
08/29/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010829511 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS MICHAEL COLEMAN
08/29/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-010918561 KEITH REITMAN VS SHEREE BREEDLOVE; HENRY BREEDLOVE; JOHN DOE; JANE DOE
09/18/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-01-1002035 RUTHIE P LIVINGSTON vs KEITH REITMAN
10/02/2001
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

27-CV-HC-011010520 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMEN VS LATAYNIA SLEDGE
10/10/2001
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-020208530 KEITH REITMAN VS NATHAN S MASCARENHAS; ALSO KNOWN AS NATHAN SAMUEL WHITE; SYLVIA MASCARENHAS
02/08/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-020222508 KEITH REITMAN VS NATHAN S MASCARENHAS; ALSO KNOWN AS NATHAN S WHITE; SYLVIA MASCARENHAS
02/22/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-02-0326058 PATRICIA MADISON, RUSSELL MADISON vs KEITH REITMAN
03/26/2002
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

27-CV-TC-000029788 REITMAN,KEITH, VS COUNTY OF HENNEPIN
04/01/2002
- Hennepin Civil
Tax Court
Closed

(Back to tax court again!)

27-CV-HC-020409519 KEITH REITMAN VS DARRYL CHARLES THOMAS
04/09/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-020423501 KEITH REITMAN VS ELSIE ROBERSON; TINA WILLIAMS; JOHN DOE; JANE DOE
04/23/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-020507501 KEITH REITMAN VS BRIAN JONES; CHARLES LEONARD THOMAS
05/07/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-020814900 CITY OF MINNEAPOLIS VS KEITH REITMAN
08/14/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Rent Escrow
Closed

(Reitman on the receiving end for a change. Ouch)

27-CV-HC-020923508 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS PAUL GLUBINSKI; CALVIN DAY; NIKKI DOE
09/23/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-020927509 KEITH REITMAN VS SHEREE BREEDLOVE; HENRY BREEDLOVE; JOHN DOE
09/27/2002
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-030211537 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS CINDY RODRIGUEZ; ANTONIO RODRIGUEZ
02/11/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-030213540 KEITH REITMAN VS MAUREEN N UMEADI
02/13/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-030410519 KEITH REITMAN VS ERIC SWOOPE; FERIDIA TURNER; JOHN DOE
04/10/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-03-0508036 CHARLES THOMAS vs KEITH REITMAN
05/08/2003
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

(Wonder what this civil case was about?)

27-CV-HC-030514571 JAMES L LANG; KEITH REITMAN VS BOBBY ROGERS
05/14/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-03-0611061 MAUREEN N UMEADI vs KEITH REITMAN
06/11/2003
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

27-CO-03-0616040 CHARLES THOMAS vs KEITH REITMAN
06/16/2003
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

(There's that Charles Thomas case again)

27-CV-HC-030912534 KEITH REITMAN VS TANYA L LEE
09/12/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-030912535 KEITH REITMAN VS JEWELL D SIMMONS; GEORGENIA HEARD; ALSO KNOWN AS GEORGENIA SIMMONS
09/12/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-03-016732 REITMAN,KEITH,D VS WILLIAMS,ANNABELLE ,
10/03/2003
- Hennepin Civil
Oleisky, Allen
Contract
Closed

27-CV-03-017192 THOMAS,CHARLES,L VS REITMAN,KEITH,
10/13/2003
- Hennepin Civil
Hedlund, Deborah
Conciliation Appeal
Closed

(And there's the same part again! That matter sure dragged on for a while)

27-CV-HC-031215519 KEITH REITMAN VS WAYNE HUFF; ANGELA SULLIVAN; ALSO KNOWN AS ANGELA SULLIVAN HUFF
12/15/2003
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-CD-000002746 COUNTY OF HENNEPIN VS Q C ENERGY II LC
04/06/2004
- Hennepin Civil
Porter, Charles A., Jr.
Condemnation
Closed

(A condemnation case...Reitman apparently a party to the case)

27-CV-HC-040628516 KEITH REITMAN VS LISA HERON; ALSO KNOWN AS LISA HERRON; JOHN DOE; JANE DOE
06/28/2004
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-040804528 KEITH REITMAN VS CHARLOTTE RENE KING JOHN DOE JANE DOE
08/04/2004
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-040920529 KEITH REITMAN VS LESLIE DAVIS; EARTH PROTECTOR INC
09/20/2004
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

(Oh, my! Keith Reitman versus perennial third party "also ran" Leslie Davis, who is currently running for governor, and whose odds of winning are roughly the same as getting struck by lightning)

27-CV-HC-050407519 KEITH REITMAN VS DENNIS WILLIAMSON; JOHN DOE; JANE DOE
04/07/2005
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-050415541 KEITH REITMAN VS LISA LETEXIER; RON REYNOLDS; JOHN DOE; JANE DOE
04/15/2005
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CO-05-0419031 KEITH REITMAN vs MAURICE WRIGHT, MICHAEL WRIGHT
04/19/2005
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation - Housing
Closed

27-CV-HC-050419534 KEITH REITMAN VS MAURICE WRIGHT; MICHAEL WRIGHT; JOHN DOE; JANE DOE
04/19/2005
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-05-007087 REITMAN,KEITH,DAVID VS TOLLEFSON,LILLIAN,J
05/26/2005
- Hennepin Civil
Rosenbaum, Marilyn Brown
Civil Other/Misc.
Closed

27-CV-CD-000002780 COUNTY OF HENNEPIN VS ASHRAF LLC
07/21/2005
- Hennepin Civil
Reilly, Denise D.
Condemnation
Closed

(Yet another condemnation case that comes up in a search for Reitman's name)

27-CV-HC-050802527 KEITH REITMAN VS LOLA TOLBERT; JON DOE; JANE DOE
08/02/2005
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-CD-000002786 COUNTY OF HENNEPIN VS LIPPIATT,PATRICIA,
09/12/2005
- Hennepin Civil
Wexler, Thomas W.
Condemnation
Closed

27-CO-06-0530018 KEITH REITMAN vs ANITA ASHFORD, AKA ANITA WOMACK
05/30/2006
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation - Housing
Closed

27-CV-HC-06-871 KEITH REITMAN vs Harlyn Rohr
05/30/2006
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-06-874 KEITH REITMAN vs Anita Ashford aka Anita Womack nka Anita Plunkett dba Soul Survivor
05/30/2006
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

(This was a record store, located where the Mississippi Hospitality business is currently located. Many folks just refer to Mississippi Hospitality as "Mississippi Hair.")

27-CV-06-20298 County of Hennepin vs Ashraf, LLC, Keith Reitman, etal
10/17/2006
- Hennepin Civil
Reilly, Denise D.
Condemnation Appeal
Closed

(A similarly-named case appears further above, though this one names Reitman)

27-CV-HC-07-1555 KEITH REITMAN vs CRISSY JAMISON
02/23/2007
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-07-5362 KEITH REITMAN vs DAKARA S. STEWARD, KAREN DENISE JONES, LATONYA LIGE
07/05/2007
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-07-5363 KEITH REITMAN vs ROBERT H MOLNAR and John Doe
07/05/2007
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-07-10287 KEITH REITMAN vs Theresa M Blanks
12/12/2007
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed-Physical File Destroyed

(Physical file destroyed? You don't see THAT very often!)

27-CO-08-0512015 MARY COLTON vs KEITH REITMAN
05/12/2008
- Hennepin Civil
Conciliation
Closed

27-CV-HC-08-5627 KEITH REITMAN vs Giana Harris, Ashley Harris
07/07/2008
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-08-6304 Keith Reitman vs Nakisha Meanweather, Marlon Johnson
07/24/2008
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-08-19011 HERMAN APPRAISAL SERVICES INC vs Keith Reitman
08/04/2008
- Hennepin Civil
Bernhardson, Ivy S.
Contract
Closed

(Why would an appraisal service sue Keith Reitman? This may be a very interesting case to look into)

27-CV-08-25631 CenterPoint Energy vs Deangelo Warner, Gabriel Hart, Colleen B Fahey, Bernard Miles, Justin Utecht et. al.
10/08/2008
- Hennepin Civil
Civil Other/Misc.
Closed

(Another case that appears under a search of Reitman's name)

27-CV-HC-08-8754 KEITH REITMAN vs TIAWON CORTNEY HENDERSON, John Doe, Jane Doe
10/10/2008
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-08-9246 KEITH REITMAN vs Areshia Nelson, Curtis L Nelson
10/23/2008
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-09-2522 KEITH REITMAN vs Heather Shultz, Nicole Burch and John Doe
03/27/2009
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-HC-09-4975 KEITH REITMAN vs Kelly N Schmaltz, Andrew R Campbell, Mark A Smith
06/18/2009
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-09-23991 Stacy Shaffer individually and as parent and natural guardian of XXXXXX vs Keith Reitman
09/23/2009
- Hennepin Civil
Blaeser, Robert A.
Personal Injury
Open

(This is the case of a child falling from a window, which I've written about previously. At the request of the mother, I have deleted the name of the child, though the name appears in online records)

27-CV-HC-10-1468 Keith Reitman vs Alice D Williamson, John Doe
03/09/2010
- Hennepin Housing
Eviction (UD)
Closed

27-CV-10-10557 KEITH REITMAN (PID: 16-029-24-24-0187) vs COUNTY OF HENNEPIN
04/29/2010
- Hennepin Civil
Tax Court
Closed

(Ah, back to tax court)

One has to wonder what will be the NEXT court case to make this list?

Plans Aired For "Prostitute Drop In Center" As Suspected Hookers Hawk Their Services On Penn Ave. N.

Video by Hans, blog post by John Hoff

"Hawthorne Hans," a regular contributor to this blog, recently made a short YouTube video of (suspected) hookers on Penn Ave. N. The (suspected) hookers are 13 seconds in, standing in front of a Linda Higgins For State Senate sign, trying to flag down Hans as he rolls past. One of the (suspected) hookers is the "defacating (suspected) hooker" who was just recently photographed taking a dump in the yard of a vacant rental property, an incident highlighted on the "Irving Inquisition" blog, click here.

There was a bitterly amusing anecdote associated with that incident, by the way. I'm told the hooker said, "Hey, you can't take my picture" and the resident taking the photo replied, "Well, you can't take a crap here, so we're even."

Currently, there are plans being aired for a "hooker drop in center" to be located on...

...the 2100 block of Emerson Ave. N., which used to be a very busy corner for prostitution, but hasn't been "grand central hooker station" for about a year since police cleaned it up. Instead--as shown in this video--the hookers hang out on Penn Ave. N. between 26th and 30th, and tend to stay at the bus stops, acting like they're waiting for a bus.

This video--in which the hookers try to flag down Hans as he rolls past--highlights another aspect of our neighborhood which needs to be highlighted. Residents have a different view from their windshields than the police. The drug dealers and hookers act differently in front of us, they do things in plain view they wouldn't do in front of a squad car or even an unmarked police car. (It's really not THAT hard to pick out the unmarked police cars)

This is the nasty crap we see on Penn Ave. N. every day, sometimes with small children in our vehicles as we beg, plead, shout for sting operations, for police to crack down on the (suspected) Penn Ave. N. hookers. Increasingly, however, it appears residents will be forced to handle the problem themselves with video cameras. As revealing as this short video might be, videos of suspected johns will be even MORE revealing.

Jordan Area Community Council (JACC) Got Down To Serious Business Last Night (But Where Was Slumlord Keith Reitman?)

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Meeting at the Plymouth Christian Youth Center (PCYC) last night, the Jordan Area Community Council tackled an impressive laundry list of neighborhood issues, affirmed Michael "Kip" Browne as its Chair, and met in closed session over the latest frivolous grievance filed by Level Three sex offender Peter "Spanky Pete" Rickmyer.

As discussed in a previous blog post, Rickmyer appears to be claiming his loathsome and disgusting "pedophile" status makes him a member of a protected class for purposes of discrimination, like race and gender.

Yup, just another fun-filled JACC meeting. Here's the rundown...

1.) City Council Member Don Samuels--who lives quite near JACC headquarters--would like to have office space at the "JACC house" so he can meet, conveniently, with constituents. JACC approved the request, unanimously.

2.) Vincent Thomas, the Director of Development at Kwanzaa Community Church in Minneapolis, spoke of his desire to provide a drop-in center for women involved in prostitution. The drop-in center would be on the 2100 block of Emerson Ave. N. This would allow the women to talk to social workers, use bathrooms, etc. in a comfortable space "instead of having to go all the way downtown" for the same services.

Expect more editorials on this topic, but the Irving Inquisition blog has a great example of what our neighborhood is enduring due to the presence of these so-called "sex workers," click here.

3.) David Snyder, a Community Organizer for Jewish Community Action, spoke of the need for more folks to help with door knocking as part of the ongoing outreach by the Northside Community Reinvestment Coalition to help individuals experiencing mortgage problems to save their homes.

4.) There was a presentation on plans for the upcoming Minneapolis public schools headquarters. Impressive architectural drawings were circulated. Four individuals presented on this topic: former City Council president Jackie Cherryhomes, Todd Elkins of Urban Home Works, Mark Bollinger, the Executive Director of Facilities at Minneapolis Public Schools, and Lynn R. Littlejohn, Director of Community Affairs for Mortenson Construction.

Though many aspects of the project were covered, I was particularly interested in the fact some "public art" would be incorporated into the project. During the comment period, I spoke up and expressed a hope any such public art would be "tasteful" and not done in a style I would dub "contemporary urban dystopia," which celebrates the aesthetic of graffiti, decay, and lawlessness. I pointed out there were many individuals (Gratia Countryman comes to mind) who have made substantial educational contributions to Minneapolis, and have connections to the Northside. These individuals are deserving of tasteful statues in their honor. Or, to sum it up another way: ANYTHING BUT A GRAFFITI MURAL LIKE THE "TRIPPING COWS" ON THE SIDE OF THE KEMPS BUILDING.

5.) There was an extensive discussion on using "buy back dollars" to promote more police presence in the Jordan Neighborhood. The discussion got incredibly bogged down--and, it is fair to say, somewhat tense--over a desire by some members in the community to use bike and foot patrols only. It is fair to say "drive by policing" is a major concern and source of irritation in this neighborhood. When Jordan residents call police about a hooker on Penn Ave. N., we want the police to get out, check identification, do pat down searches, detain, and INTERACT INTENSELY AND INTERPERSONALLY WITH THE SUSPECTS, rather than making a "keep on moving" motion from behind their windshield while slowing down to five miles an hour.

6.) Three recommendations came from the Housing Committee. A.) Supporting the preliminary design proposal for the Minneapolis Public Schools headquarters building, B.) supporting a variance and conditional use permit for Alliance Housing/Gateway Lofts, C.) recommending JACC support the Lowry Avenue Strategic Plan and proposed zoning changes.

7.) Michael "Kip" Browne, serving as Chair in the wake of the resignation of Vladamir Monroe, was unanimously reaffirmed without opposition. Eric Johnson was appointed Vice Chair, without opposition, after two other board members declined nominations to the position of Vice Chair.

8.) The most exciting part of the night was closed to the public: dealing with Peter "Spanky Pete" Rickmyer's latest frivolous and stupid grievance.

If I had to hazard a guess as to how the matter will be resolved, I'm guessing JACC will write a letter saying pedophilia is NOT a protected class, the grievance therefore has no basis, and Peter Rickmyer should go crawling back to whatever dark snake hole he crawled out of. (I'm paraphrasing the last part) Unless, of course, the grievance is just dismissed by the Minneapolis Civil Rights Department, which is what SHOULD have happened.

9.) A grievance filed by the Penn Gas Station was resolved. The gas station--which is a filthy hole where dubious activity takes place openly right in front of employees, see a recent blog post regarding THAT, click here--had its metaphorical pants all in a sweaty bunch over something that had been said in long-ago minutes about how the store had been raided by police. The comment had been made by some random community member during open commentary, and NOT by a board member.

The store denies it has ever been raided. JACC agreed to change the minutes to reflect the fact the store had never been raided. How this old, obscure portion of the minutes ended up in front of the store owners is not hard to guess. This may be a good time to mention Peter "Spanky Pete" Rickmyer has been known to work at the store.

The store, pictured above, recently laid down new blacktop in its parking lot, which will undoubtedly improve the store as much as lipstick will improve a pig.

10.) At the very end of the meeting, right before closed session, a relatively recent Jordan resident and proud home owner stepped forward and politely asked to join the board. She highlighted some experience serving on other boards, which she promised to document with a resume.

She was appointed to the board, conditionally, and must present documentation of her residency by the next board meeting.

The appointment is only good until October, when JACC board elections will be held again.

Oh, and on a final note: Slumlord Keith Reitman, who is a JACC board member and usually makes JACC board meetings, missed this particular meeting.

One can't help but suspect the heat is a little too hot in the kitchen for Reitman's tastes, but this is all Johnny Northside Dot Com can say at the present time about this matter.

Stay tuned as more information comes available.

Why Is It So Hard To Catch Graffiti Vandals When They Document Their Work All Over The Internet?

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Consider, if you will, the prolific graffiti vandal who calls himself "Shock." This guy paints his tag on almost anything that presents a flat surface. Considering how prolific this guy is, and how long he's been tagging stuff, he's probably done tens of thousands of dollars worth of property damage in the Twin Cities alone.

The owners of buildings and rail cars PREFER to have a uniform and decent paint job, rather than splashing any old thing on patches of tagging. So how does one reckon the damage done by tagging? Do you count the whole paint job which would be needed to fix the damage and make the damaged surface look perfect again? Or do you count the relatively minor cost of the "patch job," in terms of labor and materials? Do you count the anger and annoyance of property owners? Do you count the time of city officials to take reports and send out letters and inspection teams when property owners just throw up their hands and don't bother to get rid of graffiti? So prolific 311 callers like myself call it in?

No matter how you reckon up the cost, somebody like "Shock" does a lot of damage. So how much effort is actually put forward by authorities when it comes to catching somebody like Shock? Judging by the extensive trail of documentation to be found on the internet, where Shock and his tagger buddies show off their work...

It truly appears no authorities are looking for Shock, investigating Shock, trying to figure out the identity of Shock. This is hardly surprising when you consider how our city government has underfunded the Minneapolis Police Department, in what are admittedly tight and difficult times. I've heard, for example, there are 700 white collar crime investigations which have their own file. And there are only two Minneapolis police officers handling those 700 files. Individuals who approach the police about embezzlement, mortgage fraud, etc., are reportedly told to "get in line."

So what does it matter that Shock and his friends take pictures of their tagging, pictures of themselves posing with tags or actively tagging, and these pictures are posted in numerous places on Flickr.com along with extensive discussion or commentary?

Check this out. GO TO THIS LINK I'M ABOUT TO GIVE YOU. Click on some of the pictures of tagging by "Shock" and follow the little electronic trails to the numerous Flickr.com profiles to see who is taking pictures of Shock's tagging, who is commenting on it, and what's being documented in their own pictures. Ready? OK, go to this link for a while, click here.

Given the wide, well-lit trail to clues about the identity of Shock and dozens of other taggers, it's apparent that if the authorities WANTED to find Shock and arrest him (along with dozens of his friends) it wouldn't be THAT difficult to follow the electronic trail of breadcrumbs right to their suburban bedrooms where they slumber beneath band and movie posters, dreaming pathetic emo dreams of smoking sticky bud and painting rail cars.

There is, however, apparently no political will to apprehend taggers unless a squad car rolls right into them, can of spray paint in hand. And, honestly, I'd prefer to see white collar mortgage fraudsters prosecuted first, but here's the thing: there aren't THAT many taggers. The trail of clues is EASY.

How much effort would it take for the authorities to locate, arrest and prosecute taggers IF THEY REALLY WANTED TO? And if the police aren't going to do it, who will? Do coalitions of businesspeople need to hire private detectives, file lawsuits? What? What needs to happen?

Some months ago, while out doing my on again, off again trucking job, I rolled through Cincinnati, Ohio. This is a town where the city fathers have apparently just thrown up their hands, and let the taggers win. From the highway, Cincinnati looks ugly and post-apocalyptic because there's so much graffiti. But it's not that difficult for Minneapolis to start looking like Cincinnati if decent people just give up, and let the taggers win.

Recently, Shock left a taunting message to city officials. They should save their money, he has nothing but time. A message like can be translated thusly: I AM JUST BEGGING YOU TO MAKE AN EXAMPLE OUT OF ME. IT'S NOT ENOUGH THAT I DAMAGE PUBLIC AND PRIVATE PROPERTY WITH IMPUNITY, I WILL ALSO TAUNT YOU WITH MY LAWLESSNESS AND MAKE MYSELF OUT TO BE SOME KIND OF URBAN LEGEND.

I say find Shock, and give him some time. Some time in a correctional facility. Some time picking up trash. Some time painting over tags, starting with all his own tags, so well documented on Flickr.com. Of course, maybe Shock can get some kind of plea bargain in exchange for the identities of numerous other taggers.

One can only hope.

Brian Reichow, Chriss Garlick Celebrate Engagement With A NoMi House Party!

Photo of Chriss Garlick from Facebook, blog post and

other photos by John Hoff

All-around-great-guy Brian Reichow, who lives in the Willard Homewood Neighborhood not very far from Homewood Studios, recently announced his engagement to Chriss Garlick and threw a house party to celebrate. Brian's home has been featured on the...

...NoMi home tour, and it's an outstanding example of how comfortable and even luxurious life can be in North Minneapolis. (NoMi) Here are some photos from the party.

Above, key lime pie dip with vanilla wafers was one of many yummy things served. Guests also enjoyed grilled hamburgers and hot dogs.
Chriss Garlick has her own special beverage: mango lemonade. She put out the ingredients for the drink and told everybody how to mix it. It consists of 1/3 mango juice, and 2/3 lemonade. Incredibly, Garlick's signature drink contains no garlic at all!
Fred the block club leader is so green, he has his own permanent name sticker. I asked Fred what were the pressing block club issues in that part of North Minneapolis? Fred told me about some transitional housing which appeared, and ONE neighbor was all upset about it...but then after talking to the folks involved in the housing, she was no longer concerned, and there have been "no problems" due to the transitional housing.

Oh, also there is one vacant and boarded up property which needs to be torn down. The building has a raze order on it, so that will be taken care of in the foreseeable future. Crime wasn't really much of an issue on the block. Gee, looks like being a block club leader on that part of Russell Ave. N. isn't as difficult as some other places in North Minneapolis. (No offense to Fred, who seems like a great guy!) I'd be happy if our whole neighborhood were this way and it's a great goal.
Brian Reichow was a state spelling bee champ, (click here for related JNS blog post) and his trophy occupies a highly visible spot.
Brian still has some signs on display from the NoMi home tour, which give interesting historical tidbits about Brian's house.
A sign hanging on the wall in Brian's den. Brian's computer tech support services are affordable and top-notch.

My son Alex, hanging out near Brian's vintage, fully-functional pinball machine.

What a wonderful and fulfilling life appears to be in store for Brian and his bride-to-be! Johnny Northside Dot Com wishes the couple well.

Hula Hooping and Other Exchanges in Kisarawe, Tanzania

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman. Video and photo by "Kaka Tembo," or "Brother Elephant," my younger brother who happens to be an offensive lineman in a Division II college.

After learning to hula hoop last year, the activity has surprisingly become one of my favorite hobbies. I've made my own hoop (with some help), regularly hoop several times a week at Farview, and even went to show some kids at Sojourner Truth Academy how fun this is.

So when I was told I should bring along gifts for a school I would volunteer at while on my trip to Tanzania, I didn't think twice before deciding to bring along hula hoops. I DID have to think, however, about...

...how I'd actually GET the hoops to Tanzania.

When I was packing, I was told, "Set aside only what you think you'll need for three weeks. Then pack half of that." As it happens, I was the only family member to follow that advice, but I got all of my things into one carry-on and one checked item, thus allowing me to check the 100 feet of tubing.

I wasn't able to find the kind of tape I'd need, but it turns out I wouldn't have had time to decorate the hoops anyway. The pipe cutter and connecting pieces went in my carry-on luggage, and then it was just a matter of clearing customs. Checking the hoops stateside was surprisingly easy; nobody even batted an eyelash. In Arusha, though, customs had a hard time believing I was bringing this stuff for something other than selling construction materials on the black market.

I tried explaining hula hooping to the customs people, but it just wasn't sinking in. I briefly considered trying to mime hula hooping. However, I quickly realized that a herky-jerky pelvic gyration looks even stranger WITHOUT a hula hoop. Doing this to an already suspicious customs agent would probably get me locked away in a small room somewhere.

Eventually the family's church trip credentials and the presence of other gifts convinced the guy to let us through. Below are some of the presents my brothers and I gave to kids at the school in the Kisarawe district outside of Dar es Salaam:






My only disappointment was that we couldn't spend more time with the kids. David, Aaron, and I got to watch the World Cup finale with over 100 wildly cheering youth, which was an experience in itself. The broadcast of the game was delayed because every channel was showing the Tanzanian equivalent of C-SPAN. The dominant political party had just picked its endorsed candidate for the upcoming presidential elections, and the pomp and circumstance was being paraded around for all to see.

I told one young man how Obama rescheduled his state of the union address so that Americans wouldn't be mad at him or his party for interrupting a popular TV show. He said, "That's a great idea. I'm not going to vote for this party now." I'm not sure if he was joking, as sarcasm is often lost in cultural translation.

David, Aaron, and I spent time in the classrooms as well. The random neural firings of children who want to know anything and everything about us and about America was enthralling, energizing, and often amusing. One kid asked, "Please tell us about the history of America." We had less than ten minutes before the end of the class period. By the time we gave VERY brief overviews of Plymouth Rock, slavery, and the Civil War, they were on to the next question. "Is Michael Jackson really dead? Because I heard a rumor that he's alive."

Kids also wanted to know about what kinds of accents we have in America. (southern drawl, a midwestern patois, an east coast dialect, and pirate, I answered. Ok, not really with the pirate.) Then someone expressed deep concern that George W. Bush was a Freemason, and didn't they or the government kill JFK? Oh, and are Americans all vampires like in Twilight? (No, but if we were, we would be more like the vampires in Blade. France would get the Twilight vampires.)

As much as I enjoyed the randomness of children, I felt we were doing more to disrupt their planned curriculum than help their education. Which, I suppose, is typical for Americans. I would have preferred to stay longer, sit in the classes, see what was being taught, and then add what I could. My only consolation is that Michael Jackson is probably still alive, because it's incredibly difficult to kill a hula hooping Freemason vampire who talks like a pirate. Or at least that's what I told the kids at Kisarawe.

Zanzibar Historic Housing Photo Tour

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman, except for third photo from the top, taken by "Baba Askofu."

Several days ago my family and I took a break from the daily grind of Tanzanian-Michigan church politics (which, to be quite honest, is not really that much of a grind) and went to the island of Zanzibar. Aside from relaxing on the beach, I knew there was one place I just HAD to visit: Stone Town. This is an internationally-recognized historic site, and the more I can learn about preservation of historic houses, the more I can bring that experience back home to NoMi.

The second picture from the top is of a large building that straddles a main commercial corridor in Stone Town. There is a one-way sign, as the passageway is too narrow for more than one car at a time. But, like many traffic laws in Tanzania, the direction in which cars are SUPPOSED to go is really more like a suggestion - and not a strong one at that. One has to wonder how many head-on collisions there are here.

Our tour guide said that some buildings were constructed as early as the 15- and 1600's, although most research I've done since then indicates he may have been embellishing things. Still, buildings standing from as long ago as 1780 are quite impressive. The MOST impressive aspect, though, was...

...the doors, often referred to as "Arab doors," they were designed by Yemeni and Indian traders. It's been said that the ornate doors were so prized that people would buy those FIRST and then build their house around that. I'm standing in front of one such door in the last photo above, and below are some shots of what passed for a home security system when this house was built. The spikes were meant to keep out elephants, rhinos, and other animals.




Zanzibar is about 98% Muslim at this point, so the mosques and other similar doors aren't decorated with the same imagery. Still, the woodwork is nothing short of amazing.









It was also common in the early 1900's for builders to stamp the construction date in the stone above the doors. 1933 was the LATEST year of new construction that was readily apparent from the street.



Here was the oldest-looking building we saw. Our guide said that no building can be demolished without going through an extensive application process with the local historical district. (Despite the fact that, according to some sources, as much as 75% of the buildings are considered "deteriorating.") When I asked what happens to people who demolish buildings WITHOUT going through this process, I was told, "The penalties are most severe." Sure sounds like an improvement over the lack of protection for some historic buildings in Minneapolis.



Among the famous people to have called Stone Town home are Freddie Mercury of Queen, and abolitionist David Livingstone. The last active slave trading market was on Zanzibar, and a church has been built over that site. At the foot of the altar, there is a marker where the whipping post once was. Powerful stuff.






And here we are, back where we started, but on the other side of the first building. I couldn't help but wonder, what housing, and what historic features will be standing in NoMi a hundred and two hundred years from now? Will the homes built at the turn of the century or before still be standing? Will the houses we're building as new construction still be there?

Fallout From The "Chocolate Milk Patrol" Hits 2430 Logan Ave. N. (Summer Visitation, 2010)

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

A short time ago, I wrote about how a minor quest to fetch chocolate milk for my 13-year-old son led to an epic binge of calling 311. Here is some of the recent fallout from "chocolate milk patrol" at 2430 Logan Ave. N....

This property has boards on it, but not boards from the city. Also, there appears to be a squatter living in the basement, gaining access through a broken window. There is a light on in the basement, so electricity is coming from SOMEWHERE, but who knows HOW or who is paying the light bill?

Anyway, shortly after I called 311 the city came out and slapped up some paper, saying the owner of the house needs to do something about the boarded up condition by September 7, 2010.

Good luck finding the owner, though. The house is currently listed in the name of a "Wanda Williams" residing at that same address.

Seven Shootings In Seven Hours: Finally, Somebody Gets EVICTED!

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Riddle me this: which is easier, living near thug neighbors like the no accounts at 2651 Newton Ave. N., or eating a small plate full of fried crickets?

Personally, I don't care for the flavor of crickets when compared to other edible insects, like silkworm pupae, ant larvae, or (my personal favorite) bamboo caterpillars. While the characteristic which distinguishes most so-called "edible" bugs from bugs considered non-edible is the lack of notable flavor in an "edible" insect, crickets are outside the edible bug norm because they actually have quite a bit of flavor. And that flavor is something like the smell of wet laundry.

Consider this: Suppose you lived near one of the houses involved in the notorious "seven shootings in seven hours" fiasco which happened recently in North Minneapolis? Further, let us suppose that after the shootings there were no accounts constantly gathering at one of the houses (specifically 2651 Newton Ave. N.) sitting on the lawn drinking, flagging down passing vehicles for dubious transactions, having loud and scary arguments in the street, "boom cars" hanging around at all hours of the night.

Now, suppose all you needed to do for the thugs to go away was eat a small plate of crickets...

Would you do it? Would you chow down on the crickets? Keep in mind, one of those stray bullets could hit your house, your child, your pet, or (if you're lucky) your VHS copy of Terminator 2: Judgment Day, (1991) which recently happened to a senior citizen living near the family of Anthony "Phat Phat" Titus.

Those crickets are looking more yummy every moment, aren't they?

But there's some good news for neighbors on Newton: the landlord who owns 2651 Newton Ave. N. reports he was already in the process of evicting the tenants at that address because they'd threatened him. The eviction process was said to be well underway at the time of the shooting incident. A "writ of restitution" has already been served on the tenants, and the date has passed for the tenants to leave. So, at this point, everybody is just waiting for the sheriff's department to show up and escort these thugs off the premises, and good riddance.

The landlord of 2651 Newton Ave. N. was very apologetic and cooperative with one Northside neighbor who called him about the issue, and said he owns six other rental properties in the same area--that he lives here on the Northside--and he's dealing with his own landlord headache next door to his own property.

Keith Reitman "Slumlord Window" Trial Postponed...

Contributed photo, blog post by John Hoff

Johnny Northside Dot Com previously reported on a trial scheduled for today, in which North Minneapolis slumlord Keith Reitman is being sued over a small child falling from a window of his "ugly ass chocolate brown building" on the 1400 block of West Broadway. This is the third documented instance of a child falling from a building owned by Keith Reitman, by Reitman's own admission under oath.

However, today's trial has been delayed due to "issues the judge is taking under advisement" according to one of the judge's clerks. It is unknown when the trial will resume.

(Do Not Click "Read More")

Mysterious Truck Fire Near 22nd and 3rd Ave. N. (This Truck Was Truly A "Blazer")

Photo and blog post by John Hoff


About ten o'clock tonight, JNS blog received a telephonic report of a burning vehicle near 4th St. N. and 22nd Ave. N.

The vehicle, as it turned out, was a 2000 model blazer, license plate UHN 068. The truck appeared a total loss, though I thought the tires still looked good and I kind of hoped they wouldn't go to waste. A fire department official who seemed to be an arson investigator was on the scene, taking pictures and poking around. A police officer was willing to state the vehicle was NOT stolen but added, "I don't think we'll ever know what happened, here." No frantic, upset owner was spotted at the scene and individuals from the nearby houses seemed eager to stay inside.

The whole thing is, indeed, rather mysterious. The street where the vehicle blazed up is a dark, isolated corner of the neighborhood where 22nd Ave. N. peters out and becomes 3rd Street North, which runs along the dreary-looking sound barrier between the houses and Interstate 94. It's a perfect place to set fire to a vehicle and get away. The vehicle was about midway between 3rd and 4th, in front of 310 22nd Ave. N. (There is no reason to believe the address is, in any way, connected with the vehicle fire)

(Do not click "Read More")

The Prolific Graffiti Vandal Known As "Shock" Taunts Property Owners, Police...

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Anybody who pays attention to graffiti in Minneapolis knows one of the most prolific current taggers uses the handle "Shock." His tags are everywhere and have been for a couple of years, now. Of course, up here in North Minneapolis we don't have a lot of graffiti because, as everybody knows, the most prolific taggers are spoiled suburban emos, and most spoiled suburban emos are afraid to set foot in North Minneapolis unless they're in a car full of friends trying to score weed.

But I consider the North Loop neighborhood to be part of the Johnny Northside Dot Com beat, and recently in North Loop I came across the following message which Shock left for a property owner who--so it appears--had repeatedly painted over graffiti.

"SAVE YOUR MONEY, I'VE GOT NOTHING BUT TIME."

Why, I wonder, can't...

...prolific graffiti vandals like Shock be caught and arrested? I mean, honestly, they hit the same spots over and over. How hard would it be to set up bear traps? (Um, cameras! I meant to say CAMERAS!)

Actually, my main beef against graffiti vandals is NOT the fact they damage property. Even though "paint overs" look ugly, the amount of actual property damage is relatively little if property owners will simply accept the fact "paint overs" are the way to handle graffiti, instead of re-painting an entire building or tediously trying to match paint.

No, my beef is the fact graffiti vandals have very little to say except their made-up names, over and over, like the Pokemon characters my kid watches, sometimes, during Saturday morning cartoons. Like, OK, your fake, made-up name is "Shock." I get it. But, um, WHY is your name is "Shock?" What is so "shocking" about you? Nothing, as far as I can see. What you do is not shocking, but pointless.

If urban graffiti artists were saying something clever or thought provoking or politically radical, then I might think, "Well, this is the only way they can scream their radical message to the world." But graffiti is saying NOTHING of value or substance, absolutely NOTHING. In all the years "Shock" has been tagging, this message on this wall is the first time I've seen him use an actual SENTENCE.

So I want to say, "Come on, Shock, don't leave us hanging, here. Use more words. Tell us what is the freaking POINT?"

On another note, the City of Minneapolis has been tolerating "vigilante graffiti abatement" of the kind practiced by Ed Kohler of The Deets blog and, to a much smaller degree, myself. (Honestly, if I'd had some spray paint in my vehicle, I would have painted over Shock's message right then and there)

I think Minneapolis should make it easier to get graffiti cleaned up by volunteers. Property owners could designate buildings troubled by graffiti as "free fire abatement zones," meaning any good citizen would be authorized to paint over graffiti without bothering to ask or consult with the owner...like I was ready to do, then and there, with Shock's little missive to the world.

Minneapolis is a city filled with citizens who are both clever and concerned. Surely there is a way to win this petty battle against angst-filled suburban emos with too much time and paint on their hands?

Toads, Earwigs, Are Everywhere In North Minneapolis This Year!

Photo, blog post by John Hoff

Observant Northside neighbors report baby toads and earwig insects are especially numerous in North Minneapolis this year. Right now the baby toads are small enough to fit comfortably on top of a dime. One neighbor found about a dozen of the little toads in a relatively small patch of her flower garden while putzing around. She caught all the toads in a bucket and let them go closer to the Jordan Pond. In the photo above, I caught two little toads in a patch of grass no bigger than a love seat, escaping just ahead of a lawn mower. It's easy to extrapolate and realize these little toads are EVERYWHERE, but as for what accounts for their numbers, who can say?

In regard to earwig insects...

...these creepy looking little monsters are also especially numerous this year, and seem to love moist areas. For example, if you leave a pop can on the ground, in a day or two you can come back and find a dozen earwigs inside.

I hope the little toads hurry up and grow, so they can eat the earwigs.