Get to NoMi Home Buyers Tour on Sunday!

Post and photo by the Hawthorne Hawkman

The last time we had a Get to NoMi home buyers tour, CM Hofstede read a mayoral proclamation of "Get to NoMi day." Here on Johnny Northside, we believe that EVERY DAY can be a Get to NoMi day. NoMi Realtors and others active in the Get to NoMi movement are keeping up their work in that same spirit.

On Sunday, April 11, another NoMi Home Buyers Tour will take place at the 42nd Avenue Station beginning at 11 a.m. Lists of homes can be picked up between 11 and 1, and homes are available to tour between noon and 3 p.m. According to the event's Facebook site, the number of homes on the tour currently stands at 40. The days of purchasing a $7,900 house may be gone, but prices range from a still affordable $59,000 to rather upscale $349,000.

There is no word whether the dinosaur by Ken Farkash will make an appearance.

(Do not click "Read More," but do Get to NoMi!)

This Sign Spammer Isn't Even Trying

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman

I was driving past the former site of Ken's Metal Finishing on 24th and Emerson when I saw this sign nailed to a telephone pole. I didn't even have to get out my umbrella (which no longer opens as it is bent out of shape from sign bashing) to reach this. And the nails were so short they barely pierced the flimsy plastic sign.

I thought of Obi-Wan Kenobi in the Star Wars cantina scene: "This little one's not worth the effort; come, let me buy you something," and almost left the sign there. But a) there was nobody offering me a drink, and b) if this sign spam is so ridiculously easy to take down, do you really want someone that lazy moving your stuff?

(Do not click "Read More.")

Strong, Brave Atlas Pillar Gets A Much Deserved Makeover!

Cell phone photo by Brian Finstad, blog post by John Hoff

Regular readers of JNS blog have heard about the "Atlas Pillar," which was holding up the front porch of the house Connie Nompelis (Realtor, historic preservationist) bought for $7,900.

Tonight, word comes from...

...Brian Finstad that the Atlas Pillar--which has since been joined by reinforcements--got a "revitalization makeover" in the past few days. We in NoMi know revitalization is bustin' out all over, but highly-visible outward signs like this really give a boost to troop morale. Thanks for the great photo, Brian.

And Verily It Came To Pass...In The Land Of North Minneapolis...

Contributed photo, blog post by John Hoff

A North Minneapolis resident sent me this photo taken mere minutes ago of some dude taking a leak against the wall of a neighboring house. Apparently, this happens a couple times a week. The resident can't figure out if the house lacks adequate plumbing or if the residents and guests just lack bladder control, and so need to constantly urinate in their yard. I say, "Let 311 sort it out."

Free advice from Johnny Northside: be a good citizen in North Minneapolis, you never know when somebody with a digital camera is watching, click here for another example.

One can't help but be reminded of a Bible verse at 1 Kings 16:11, as follows:

"And it came to pass, when he began to reign, as soon as he sat on his throne, that he slew all the house of Baasha: he left him not one that pisseth against a wall, neither of his kinsfolk, nor of his friends."

Why do I bring this up? Because in a recent blog discussion on the comment threads, a certain resident of upper Willard Homewood said if a phrase is offensive, it should not be used. And I responded, well, what about certain very graphic phrases in the Bible? Do you include THAT? Rather than letting that discussion lie buried in the comment threads, I thought I would bring it to the front burner. If a phrase is offensive to some people, should it not be used?

(Do not click "Read More")

Johnny Northside Blog Gets Scooped Twice...And That's A Good Thing!

Photo and blog post by John Hoff

Recently, I was going to post some info about utilities being marked off at 2700 Morgan Ave. N. in obvious preparation for demolition. This house--known as the "Salmon House" because of the color--was a notorious drug den slash whorehouse and the bane of the neighborhood for far too long.

But before I could post the info...

...the same information hit the Hillside Chronicles blog, click here.

Around the same time, I received some lovely photos which had been commissioned by the former director of JACC, and turned up recently. Yeah, too bad missing JACC records can't turn up the same way. I'm just saying. But anyway...

The photos were too good to NOT publish, even though their origins are unknown. So I was (as they say in the South) "fixing to" publish those images, when the JACC Flash Nomi blog beat me to the punch, click here.

Both the Hillside Chronicles blog and "JFN" are near and dear to my heart. I'm really glad to see the NoMi revitalization movement grasping and using the power of grassroots media to move forward the revitalization agenda. The author of Hillside Chronicles has told me, many times, "I'm not trying to compete with you." And I tell him, "I wish you WOULD. Please compete with me." The more grassroots media we can develop, the better off we are. Besides, I'd rather bypass minor stories and go after the big, juicy news events.

Our three word motto here at JNS blog is content, content, content. We strive to put some kind of useful information up EVERY DAY, no matter what the circumstances. I want readers to obtain their "North news fix" from JNS blog a few times a day, or at the very least ONCE a day.

But if that doesn't happen, I would urge readers to check out other North Minneapolis blogs in search of their "news fix." Also, each and every day I go to Google and type in "North Minneapolis," then see what news stories are hitting the mainstream media. Sometimes there is an opportunity for JNS blog to snap up some loose, unsecured valuable information or to find a different angle missed by the mainstream media.

Last--but certainly not least--readers are also contributors. By adding even MORE content via comments, readers are participating directly in the grassroots media phenomenon, or (as Metro Magazine put it in their Metro Top 100 story) readers are meeting in a "virtual community center" to exchange news and views.

So, yeah, Johnny Northside blog got scooped. And I hope it keeps right on happening.

Mail Piles Up, Utility Shut Off Notices, And Where Is My Brother Ben Myers? (Parody Post)

Contributed photos, blog post by John Hoff

(This post contains parody)

(Correction to image directly above: No, Center Point Energy, we don't actually MISS Ben Myers)

Regular readers of this blog are aware of my complicated and intense relationship with "public figure" Ben Myers, who is both my paternal twin and half brother by our mutual mother, "Big Mama Sweetums." When he was quite young, Mama dropped Ben off at an orphanage in Texas. But Ben somehow found his way back, through a female "outlaw trucker" he met Lord knows how.

We all ended up in North Minneapolis, though Big Mama eventually went back to the double wide trailer house in Texas. But who knows how long THAT will last? Ben pawned Mama's trailer house to pay a judgment in a lawsuit.

(This following part is NOT parody)

In recently weeks, none of the Jordan Neighborhood movers and shakers had seen Ben for a while and...

It seemed like nobody was at Ben's house, located at 2615 Logan Ave. N., not far from the almost-famous Jordan Pond.

The folks in that area (the good ones, anyway) keep things pretty tight in the neighborhood, keeping an eye on houses inside a fairly wide perimeter. The fact Ben apparently wasn't at his house much didn't concern folks too much--after all, it's Public Figure Ben "Save Big Stop" Myers, and who wants him around, anyway, after the crap he pulled on the Jordan Area Community Council in the bad old "Old Majority" days?--but when a little utility flags appeared in the yard and a certain envelope from Center Point Energy hit the door, folks on the Jordan Pond couldn't help but notice Ben was really, really absent.

It was suggested somebody should call 911 for a "health and welfare check" on Ben Myers' residence. After all, there had been that incident on July 4 with a body found inside a house, and that house was actually within earshot of Ben's house. But who cared about Ben enough to make the call?

(Back to parody)

It was suggested everybody draw lots, but we'd used all the straws mixing up "Kip and Johnnys," which consists of Jagermeiser and Green Tea/Ginger Ale. I would have been perfectly willing to use used straws, but Kip Browne was all, like, "Dude, that's been in your MOUTH." I was all, like, sorry but you KNOW how I was raised.

Everybody agreed I should be the one to make the call, mostly because it was FUNNIER THAT WAY. I called Big Mama Sweetums first, and explained how one of the neighbors had approached the house under the city's "Keep An Eye On Vacant Houses Mandate" and noted a big pile of unopened mail.

I asked Mama if she'd heard anything from Ben or received any word from him. She said somebody had broken into her trailer and seemed to know right where the stash of "original flavor" Nyquil was located, and she'd blamed kids in the neighborhood, but (in retrospect) maybe it was Ben, because (just like Ben does) the thief had made a "sammich" for himself and left out a bunch of the mayo packets which Mama always liberates from fast food joints.

Well, not just mayo, but any condiment, really, and--ironically--hundreds of bendy straws which I could have really used that evening in North Minneapolis so we could have actually drawn straws, instead of just having the "911 for a health and welfare check" task dumped on good ol' Johnny Northside.

Did I mention Mama also drags along gallon jug and fills it with blackberry flavor sweetened ice tea from the beverage machine at White Castle? Well, she does.

Heavy sigh. I was going to have to be the one to make the call. I should get one of those "We Watch, We Call" signs and wear it around my NECK or, better yet, I could use a t-shirt like that. Some folks say "Stop Snitching." To that I want to add: yeah, dude, the cell phone minutes ALONE really add up.

I kind of hoped my own dear sweet Nyquil-addicted mother could get me out of the snithcing task, by telling me to uphold the family code and NOT call the police on my brother. But instead of telling me to say nothing, and hope Ben would turn up after an 11-day drunk in Mexico (again) here's what our dear mother said about Ben's disappearance:

"That son-of-a-biscuit with gravy owes me BIG TIME. See if the police will let you go through his pile of mail, and if you find any money or checks, send 'em to me. And keep an eye out for any of my jewelry. Oh, and my bread machine!"

Calling the police on my brother Ben was hard. Mostly because the battery was so low on my cell phone, and I didn't have the cord, so I had to look all over for the cord. So it was hard. The police wanted to know what Ben looked like, and I gave a description of his cocky smile, which matches his eyes. I was forced to explain how nobody in a certain high-profile neighborhood social circle had seen Ben for "a while," which translated into about a month when the officer on the phone pressed for more detail.

(The police questioned me BRUTALLY. Where was Dave Bicking when I needed him?)

Though not seeing Ben for a few weeks wasn't particularly worrisome--after all, Ben just wasn't very popular with certain folks--A MONTH was a long time.

And the mail. Let's not forget the mail. Ben is a lawyer, and lawyers are trained to be very responsible and oriented toward paperwork. What kind of lawyer lets mail pile up like that? Maybe nothing was wrong but (I explained) finding a body on the Fourth of July taught folks on the Jordan Pond a lesson. When mail piles up where it's not supposed to, it's time to ask some pointed questions.

As of today, a neighbor informs me the notice from Center Point Energy is missing from the door. We wait, we wonder what is happening to Ben. Did he go to another state (such as Texas) to become a lawyer elsewhere, since maybe things aren't going so well in North Minneapolis? (I mean, just judging from the pile of mail...these are not the habits of somebody whose life is going WELL)

Not only do "We Watch, We Call" but "We Wait, We Wonder"...we mostly wonder about the fate of that sweet little house, which is not such a bad house, really, even though Ben lived there.

Moments ago, even as I wrote this blog post, a Jordan resident texted me at my unknown, secure location (where serving me with Pete the Pedophile's paperwork would be pretty difficult) to inform me the notice from Center Point Energy is missing form Ben's front door. Unknown about whether the pile of mail has been resolved.

Good folks in the neighborhood can use this thread to discuss the alien abduction situation with Ben Myers. Or Ben can get on here and answer for himself.

MOM SAYS SHE KNOWS YOU HAVE THE BREAD MACHINE, BEN.

Give me mom's bread machine and I'll lay off you for a month or so. I already told Mama how you said "the double wide trailer matches her ass." Just wait until she sees it on the deposition tape, which I am ABSOLUTELY SALIVATING to get my hands upon and post right here.

You know and I know there's a lot more sibling dirt where THAT came from, Ben. It's Easter, for God's sake.

ISN'T IT TIME TO FINALLY DO WHAT IS RIGHT?

(Missing JACC paperwork and Blackberry, cough cough)

Concerned Neighbors Press 2520 23rd Ave. N. On Two Fronts...

Contributed photo, blog post by John Hoff

The property at 2520 23rd Ave. N. has been on the radar of neighbors for a while, but now with warmer weather coming on, the intuition of these neighbors (which is seldom wrong about this kind of thing) says this property is going to get out of hand. Now is the time to (in the words of Barney Fife) "nip it in the bud."

Currently, there is a two-pronged bud-nipping approach. And this blog is one of the prongs: drag the problem out in public where neighbors, listservs, other bloggers, committees, city officials and police can all scrutinize the issue via the "virtual community center" role of this blog...which is becoming more of a collective effort every day. (Seen all the new authors? Exciting!)

The other front--or you might call it the "carrot" which goes along with a "stick"--is for some concerned, super kind neighborhood folks to approach the hell-raisers at this house and...

...find out what their sensitive, tender thug needs are.

I think everybody should do what they do well, and not take on jobs they KNOW they can't do well.

So, you know, good luck to the folks who are doing the job I'm not very good at.

The house at 2520 23rd Ave. N. was placed firmly on the "pressing issues front burner" a few days ago. It happened in the way so many things happen these days in North Minneapolis: virtually. Word went out over the Upper Willard Homewood (UWHO) listserv, as follows:

Hi neighbors,

I am wondering if anyone else has noticed the myriad issues going on at this property. I am at my wits end over this place and spring has just barely begun... which gives me a very bad feeling about what is yet to come.

2520 is a duplex with two families currently living in it. The first floor tenant, Margaret, and her children are fine people, and I feel sorry for them that they have to endure a shared building with the upstairs folks (whose names I don't know - just that of their eldest kid, Cortes.)

The upstairs people are incredibly messy, routinely letting their trash (often with nastiness such as dirty diapers) fill not only their THREE garbage bins, but indeed the recycling bins and often half of the street, not to mention my adjacent driveway and their own front yard. (I have called solid waste on this on several occasions.) And, of course, they never pull their bins back up to the house - they just sit in the street seven days a week.

These tenants have also done significant damage to the house, including breaking the front door off. (I have called 311 on this on more than one occasion. It has been like this for MONTHS. And I just have to say, when my own home went without a front [porch] door for a few weeks as I searched for a replacement, I got a swift letter from inspections. )

The interior door to the upstairs apartment hangs open day and night, even during the off times when someone is not standing in it, screaming at whoever might be outside.

The eldest kid (Cortes) does not appear to go to school. At all. I work from home a lot and he is ALWAYS in the street. Typically yelling and littering and such. He appears to be about 12-13 or so.

I don't see Cortes's mother very much, save for the times when an ambulance comes to get her in the middle of the night (this has occurred probably 4 times in the last handful of months since they moved in) and when she takes her random walks down to stand in the alley next to my house and wait (presumably) for a drug delivery at odd hours during the dark of night.

The house has had ongoing maintenance issues, the most frustrating of which was last summer when the fence was falling apart. I called 311 (and others did as well) several times until the owner apparently gave up and just removed all the pickets and rails. So now the front yard just has random posts all around it.

The first floor tenant Margaret tells me that she has been threatened repeatedly by her upstairs neighbors. I saw her two days ago and she said she was going downtown to try and file some kind of charges. She is 9 months pregnant and seriously stressing out.

This property is owned by "Triumphant Properties," one of the owners of whom is a woman by the name of Mandy Meyers, who, incidentally, I just read an article about from a 2007 investor newsletter. It indicated that she strongly supports North Minneapolis, and that her cousin (?) started the Bean Scene coffee shops. (I have no idea who this cousin is.)

At any rate, I have sent cards to her (both polite and slightly-less- polite) at the address of record on the city website, and have never received a response.

Does anybody have any ideas or suggestions on what else might be done about this? I am seriously at the end of my rope. I cannot live like this. I feel angry every day. I want them OFF OF MY BLOCK.

Oh, and now that the weather is warm, these guys like to have bar-b-ques out on the front lawn. The paper plates, solo cups and booze bottles litter the street after every such event, and the cars with insanely loud music come and go throughout.

But, I will say this - at least they go sit in the car to hit the pipe, so it's ALMOST like the children don't know their parents/friends/ family are getting high....
---------------
(End of first UWHO email about 2520 23rd AVe. N.)

As is often the case with blogs and listservs, in a short while somebody contributed to the discussion with more helpful information, as follows:
---------
We had big problems here with rentals a year or so ago. First, contact the person with the rental license and the taxpayer to give them your perspective. Sometimes they are really great to work with, like Steve, who's on our list serve. Others get angry and don't see it as a problem. We have been fortunate, but with lots of work, to get a block club with 1/2 rentals and we couldn't love it more here. It wasn't the case a year or so ago. We had alleged drug dealing, shootings, loud parties, trash piled in allies and not much understanding from land lords but with lots of team work and persistence we have a block utopia here. Our landlord/renter/ owner coalition did it. Thanks to Tim Hammett for his work.

1st, call/contact these folks first and see what their response will be. Sometimes, we have found, they have little experience in what they are doing so try to help educate them with city ordinances they may not be aware of. We have found others that just have no idea what is going on and are gratefull to know. They don't know 911 calls at all. Nobody calls owners if crimes are commited at their property (it surprised us too). Some may be run by management companies that really don't care about your problem and the owners blame the property management companies. This is the hardest scenario we have found here to work with. Some owners will check out their management company but not all will. Sometimes you never hear from the management company. It can be very very frustrating dealing with this, believe me, I know. But now we reap the rewards of our daily frustration and work.

2nd, call 311 about paint chipping, broken windows, broken up sidewalks, steps, broken fences, long grass, etc. Make a list, call 311 about every item. The rest of us get orders to repair out little things too. Make sure you write down the reference number they give you. Don Samuels has aked we call him with the reference number if things are not done in 4 weeks or so (or at least started). He was a big help for us as well.

3rd, enlist your block club leader and get a phone chaine. We did and it get faster police responses when many called. Call about loud noise and say it is a party. They have certain key words they react to as we have learned. This makes a difference.

4th, if you feel stuck at any, I repeat ANY point, call me and I will follow through with you until this is resolved one way or another. It is difficult but worth the hard work. Do it before good folks that don't get involved, but are great neighbors, move. I waited too long and saw good folks leave and worse folks moved in. I will take ownership of this problem with you until it is resolved.

Here is the person with the rental license:

RLIC RENTAL LICENSING Dmitry B Mogilyansky 3141 Dean Court, #303, Minneapolis, MN 55416 612-229-9009 Aug 18, 2009 $84

Here is the owner information:

Taxpayer

Triumphant Properties Llc
2940 Sumter Ave S St Louis Park Mn 55426

Owner

Triumphant Properties Llc

Last Sale

9/17/2002

Here is the compaint history which looks to go back to 2004:

2008
RS NUM Levy # Levy Year Project Project Description Status Total
Department: HSNG - Contact Customer Service Agents at 3-1-1 or 612-673-3000 for assistance.
08-0626788 1080 2008 021 Remove Rubbish Remove Bags Of Yard Waste, Trash And All Misc. Debris From Rear Yard Next To Privacy Fence. (Entered 6-19-08) Assessed $150.33

2006
RS NUM Levy # Levy Year Project Project Description Status Total
Department: HSNG - Contact Customer Service Agents at 3-1-1 or 612-673-3000 for assistance.
06-0504245 1081 2006 011 Cut Grass/Weeds Cut Grass/Weeds Cancelled $10.00

2005
RS NUM Levy # Levy Year Project Project Description Status Total
Department: OTHER - Contact Customer Service Agents at 3-1-1 or 612-673-3000 for assistance.
05-0385060 1080 2005 021
Remove Rubbish Furniture, Wood, Plastic, Metal, Cardboard And All Other Debris In Backyard

Assessed $185.00

2004
RS NUM Levy # Levy Year Project Project Description Status Total
Department: HSNG - Contact Customer Service Agents at 3-1-1 or 612-673-3000 for assistance.
03-0305104 1080 2004 021 Remove Rubbish Carpet, Mattress And All Misc. Debris From Rear Side Yard Cancelled $10.00
04-0321041 1080 2004 021 Remove Rubbish Scrapwood, Glass, Junk Appliances, Branches, Mattress And All Misc Debris From Rear Yard Assessed $809.94

2001
RS NUM Levy # Levy Year Project Project Description Status Total
Department: HSNG - Contact Customer Service Agents at 3-1-1 or 612-673-3000 for assistance.
01-0131838 1081 2001 011 Cut Grass/Weeds Cut Grass/Weeds Cancelled $85.00

(End of UWHO email reply)
-----------
In closing, I'd like to say this: you really have to wonder how and why these folks have gotten along without a front door for so long. Why is the door gone in the first place? Did somebody kick it down? Or was it used to, well, carry off the wounded? You just gotta wonder.

How Long is Long Enough for Makeshift Memorials?

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman

Earlier this week, I was talking with some employees at businesses in the Hawthorn (sic) Crossings strip mall. One concern that got brought up was the memorial for Haywood Eaton on the corner of Broadway and Bryant.

The sun has faded much of the lettering away. The balloons have long since deflated. Many of the businesses don't want this on the property anymore, and their customers have said so too. Calls to the property owner, Sherman Associates, have gone unanswered.

People have said they wouldn't even mind taking down this memorial themselves, except for two things...

...first, a level of respect for the deceased and his loved ones, and second, the nature of Eaton's death. Like too many of our youth, he was senselessly killed in a tit-for-tat argument. Folks are rightly concerned that if the wrong person is offended by their taking down the memorial, then such action could spur more violence directed either at an individual or business in the area.

Personally, I think this makeshift memorial has long outlasted its usefulness in its current form. This isn't to say that no such memorial to Eaton should ever be placed here, and I freely admit that I have no comparison to the depths of grief that Eaton's loved ones must still be experiencing. But something that looks like this no longer pays respects to Haywood nor does it help the community. So what to do?

Ideally, the family and other loved ones of Haywood Eaton would remove these items on their own. That way if anything has sentimental value to someone, it would not be taken down and disposed of by anyone else. And then nobody would accuse people of disrespecting anyone's memory. The family could even contact Sherman Associates to see what kind of more subtle memorial the property owner might be willing to allow.

If that doesn't happen, then either the property owner or the city should remove these items, and soon. If the family and friends of Eaton, and those who placed these items here initially, don't clean things up, then somebody's got to be the bad guy.

How long do we allow such memorials to stay up? Who takes care of them? And most importantly, what do we do as a community so that these don't even need to go up in the first place?

We Watch We Call Sign Vandalized!

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman

I woke up to a text message from uber-citizen Megan Goodmundson this morning, informing me that a "We Watch We Call" sign was left in the middle of an intersection in the southern part of Hawthorne. Now it's possible that maybe the wind blew it there, right? Yeah, I didn't think so either.

Anyone who is now missing their sign, come to the Hawthorne office. We've got a shiny new one waiting for you and there's plenty more where that came from.

But I'm like the Johnny Appleseed of sign spam. For every legitimate sign that someone takes down, I'll find two that don't belong and I'll deal with them accordingly. The first one was at...

...26th and Lyndale in front of New Salem.


And then there was the one in front of Farview Park at 29th and Lyndale.



I've got to give the towing guy credit though. At least he recycled/reused a previous spam sign.

Who Wants a Bike Shop in NoMi? I Do, I Do!

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman

Now that spring is here, I've been doing some biking again. I also did my best to participate in the first "Unofficial Shop Northside First Month." That ended yesterday, so the Facebook link isn't live anymore, but we're sure to have another one soon!

But what if I blow a tire? What if I want to buy an attachment for my water bottle? I can't repair my bike or buy basic accessories here in NoMi. And I'm sure there are others just like me. That's why one week from today there will be a community focus group meeting around the possibilities of a bike shop in NoMi. The meeting will be Thursday, April 8, 6:30 p.m. at the Plymouth Christian Youth Center. A possible site, just off of Penn and Broadway, is pictured above.

Questions to be discussed at the meeting include...

...What would a successful bike shop in the Jordan neighborhood look like? Describe what kinds of merchandise and services would most likely be purchased by those in the community?

How many bikes do you have at your house? How do you use your bikes? How did you acquire your bikes? Approximately how many miles a year do you ride? Who do you ride with?

Do you pay to have your bikes serviced? How often and where? What would be important about this shop for you to change your purchasing patterns? What is missing from other urban bike shops?

What might the bike shop do and/or sell in the winter to make it a year-round business?

If the bike shop was also a community gathering place, what might it also sell, e.g. coffee, ice cream, art, clothes, sandwiches….? What combination would most likely be successful? Why?

How many ways can you think to promote a bike shop in this neighborhood?

How many ways can you think to positively engage youth in the bike shop’s operations?

Three locations are being considered and we will want the community’s input regarding the strengths and concerns regarding each of the potential sites. One is on the north side of Broadway, one on the south side of Lowry and one on the corner of Penn and 26th.

I hope to see you there, and I hope to see a bike shop in our neck of the woods soon!

Stonecrest Investments LLC Runs a Scam!

Post and photo by the Hawthorne Hawkman

As I was going through the EcoVillage today, I noticed a new sign that was posted at the former residence of the Devil, 3020 6th St N. A Google search of the phone number shown brings one to a company called Stonecrest Investments LLC. Stonecrest, it appears, buys up properties all across the country, and then resells them to other investors. This might be a sound enough business plan, except that Stonecrest wants to buy properties without EVER SEEING SOME OF THEM, and expects THEIR BUYERS TO DO THE SAME.

I wish I were joking about this, but one of the risks Stonecrest explains is that...

..."the building might have burned down, or NOT EVEN EXIST, leaving you with just the yard." (emphasis mine)

The rest of the risks that this company explains are all so ludicrous that you wonder how in the world anyone in their right minds would do business with them. I want to explain how terrible their ideas are, but if I use houses and mortgage terms, I'll get so wrapped up in the terminology that I'll bore people to tears. So instead of houses, or real estate, let's use a different example.

Let's say I'm Stonecrest and I wanted to sell you....okay, "rutabagas" is the first word that comes to mind. But here's the deal, Mr. or Mrs. Potential Rutabaga Investor: my rutabagas are all over the country, not just in one spot. But I'll sell you twenty at once, and at a steep discount.

But there's a chance that the rutabaga in Kansas City has gone rotten already.

And maybe someone ate half of your rutabaga in Raleigh.

You might want to make a casserole out of the rutabaga in Milwaukee, but they have a city ordinance that bans rutabaga casseroles.

I don't have the first clue what's happening to the rutabaga in Dubuque.

But maybe, JUUUUUST MAYBE, you'll get a prize rutabaga here in Minneapolis.

And THAT is precisely what you are purchasing by picking up bulk rutabagas at such a steep discount, my friends: the chance that you'll essentially win the rutabaga lottery and be able to sell that great one at such a profit that you can make up for your losses elsewhere. Once you've earned a pretty penny that way, I'm SURE you'll see what a great business opportunity Stonecrest Rutabagas presents and you'll--hey, where are you going? DAMNIT! What's WRONG with my business model?!

Sometimes I wonder if we've learned anything at all from the mortgage crisis.

Census Day 2010!

Post and photos by the Hawthorne Hawkman

Today is Census Day, the day when Census envelopes are hoped to be in the mail. Households that have not sent in the forms yet may receive a doorknocking visit from a Census employee. I waited until the last minute, but I did get mine in. On my way to the post office, I stopped at the Polish lady's house to check if she'd done her form yet (yes). She then showed off her first flowers that are blooming, in hopes of yet another wonderful garden this summer.

Also shown above, a Census poster at the Bangkok Market. It's especially important that underserved populations and those facing language barriers are encouraged to fill out the forms. You can also click here for a map that shows how we're doing in NoMi. Go to the "view participation rates" tab, enter a NoMi zip code and you'll see...

...that we're not doing too well. At the time of this post, the area mainly comprising the Victory neighborhood leads NoMi with a 60% response rate. But part of Jordan lags far behind at 36%. We can do better, and we need to do better for our community.

Oh, guess what is available for people who want them: Census 2010 YARD SIGNS! I'll post the contact info for the person distributing them once I get that confirmed. But I hear they look GREAT next to "We Watch, We Call."

BREAKING NEWS: Urban Exposure Exposed!

Post by the Hawthorne Hawkman, photo by John Hoff

Thank goodness for the active residents on the WHOmail listserv. The message below (after the jump) came my way a few moments ago. After a concerned citizen reached out to a business with facade improvement info and found illegal gambling instead, follow-up work was done by the MPD.

The comments on the previous blog post ranged from calls to shut down the business entirely, to saying we should mind our own business, to looking for ways to reach out to the offenders and work together. Based on what was just revealed today, it looks like the business ought to be shut down.

The email from the MPD that was posted on the WHOmail listerv said...

...In response to your complaint regarding the incident at 2421 W. Broadway we conducted an investigation of the activity there. Below are the results of the investigation and follow-up.

* You notified us of the incident last Wednesday, March 24th at Urban Exposure.
* On March 25th I drove by the business and obtained the address of 2421 W. Broadway. I also asked you and everyone else who was e-mailed to not take any action and let us look into it. That would keep us from tipping our hat and allow us to see if they were conducting illegal business out of there.
* That same day, March 25th, our Community Response Team sent an informant into the business and made a controlled buy of marijuana from one of the employees.
* Officers from the Community Response Team drafted a search warrant and presented it to a judge and continued to conduct surveillance and investigate.
* You then went to the business and met with the property owner and the downstairs folks. This alerted the upstairs folks that they were being watched and delayed our investigation slightly.
* The Community Response Team continued surveillance until the drug dealing resumed.
* Yesterday – one week after the initial complaint the Community Response Team executed a search warrant.
o They recovered marijuana that was being sold by the employees.
o They recovered 2 replica firearms.
o The business appears to be a money-laundering front for the narcotics sales.
o The merchandise the are selling is counterfeit (knock-off) clothing and pirated DVD’s and CD’s. There does not appear to be any legitimate business taking place.



Thanks. I hope this helps solve this problem.