Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Be Paranoid. Be VERY Paranoid.

Illustration From This Cryptic Website Listing

A discussion kicked off in the previous post about the prevalence of crazy conspiracy theories among the downtrodden of North Minneapolis led me to do some searching. The results are indeed worrisome...

It turns out there is actually a book called "The Hawthorn Conspiracy." See book jacket in the illustration. Published in 1986 by a "Stephen Hesla," evidence of the book's EXISTENCE but not its CONTENTS can be found all over the internet. Here's the scary part. The only thing which can be gleaned from this book off the internet is that it's some kind of...adventure.

Yes, I said "adventure" as in "The Adventures of Johnny Northside." How could I have been an unknowing pawn in this scary I-don't-know-what and not KNOWN? Mind control, that's how. By...SPACE ALIENS who are JOY RIDING IN BLACK HELICOPTERS dropping IMPOTENCY CHEMICALS in the NORTH MINNEAPOLIS DRINKING WATER as part of U of M MIND CONTROL EXPERIMENTS on HELPLESS CHILDREN.

Suddenly, everything makes so much sense. Somehow, my stolen van is part of it but I don't...know....how. Oh, and the chessmen!!!!! YES, THE HUMAN CHESS GAME WHICH IS HAWTHORNE'S CONTRIBUTION TO THE NORTHSIDE ART FLOW!!!!!!!!!!!! The chess men are definitely connected to EVERYTHING!!!!

Also--and this is VERY STRANGE--prices for this paperback book vary wildly, from $49 to merely $1. In one instance, a bookstore had only a "jacket" for sale, and not the actual book. Tell me how does THAT make sense? Furthermore, the book won some kind of critic's choice award...SO WHY IS THERE NOTHING ON THE INTERNET ABOUT WHAT IT'S ABOUT? HMMMMMMM?

The "Rosetta Stone" here--the "Jack Ruby," if you will--is the missing "e," found in both the Hawthorn Conspiracy as well as Hawthorn (Sic) Crossings strip mall, where crack cocaine DELIBERATELY BROUGHT INTO THIS COUNTRY BY THE CIA is openly sold. (Why is there an unnecessary "e" at the end of "cocaine?" Did you ever ASK YOURSELF that?)

Well, that's enough for now. More later, probably, IF I'M ALIVE.

2 comments:

Jeff Skrenes said...

Ah, but there was one round in the chess tournament where little Pete actually moved the pieces around. So maybe instead of the U of M mind control experiments, this generation is shattering the hold that the illuminati has over us.

Either that, or the experiments actually WORKED and now kids have telepathic control over us, a la "Village of the Damned."

Anonymous said...

No worries...it's the Hawthorn Conspiracy, not Hawthorne Conspiracy. It's all good, Johnny!