Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Flowers Appear In the Middle of My 911 Call (Violas, Specifically)














Flickr.com photo

I was doing my nightly security check with my vehicle, and I'd spotted "colorful jacket guy" dealing drugs in front of 416 30th, the "problem child of the block." He had three cars lined up to do business, like it was the (expletive) drive-through window at White Castle...

...so I called 911. Of course. It was so handy knowing the street address of the house in question. I sat in my car until the squad appeared and went by. I thought, "I'll get inside my house and observe through the second story window."

Truthfully, I can't see much from up there when it comes to "416," but I can hear quite a bit. As I walked to the door, I thought, "What is that sitting on the steps?"

I picked it up. A pot of flowers! There was a card tucked inside. Even in the darkness I could make out the "Century 21" logo and the photo of a young female real estate agent with reddish hair past her shoulders.

Be still my foolish heart! Was it Juley Viger? Had she switched from River Realty to Century 21 and this was her way of telling me with FLOWERS?

For moi?

I peered at the card more closely. No, not Juley. The picture really reminded me of Juley, but it wasn't her. The back of the card said, "Welcome to the North Side."

This was much nicer than a bullet to the chest, I thought. Over by 416 30th I heard a dog barking, controlled but excited, like a police dog.

I started to go inside and I stepped on something in the dark. A box which had been next to or beneath the flowers. Could it be candy? For moi? My foot had only crushed the box slightly, and not torn it open. Stepping on it didn't matter...it was flower seeds. Perennials, to be specific.

Oh, my word! I put out a request on this blog and a hot young female real estate agent left flowers at my door step!

Hey, world-at-large, I could really use GRASS SEED for the dirt-packed, nasty lawn over at 416, and a ladder to board up second story windows (even a crappy old ladder would be fine) and, yeah, paint. Loads of paint. Every color, but especially your whites, browns, grays, the color of the walls owned by decent people before taggers hit them.

(Yeah, it's true I've got friends who tag. I tell them to grow out of it)

Anyway, a big thanks to Connie Nompelis of Century 21, Luger Realty. (I looked her up on the Internet. Husband. Passion for renovation. Is she another contender for Queen Of North Side Real Estate? Looks like she wants to give Juley Viger a run for the money)

Anyway, once I got to my second story I saw two more squads go by, or maybe it was the same cop repeatedly circling the block...but I got the impression it was two more squads. I could actually touch the branches of the large, mature tree in my yard. I thought about how it would be so cool to have a little "observation deck" at the top of that tree.

Hmmmmm.

The next day, during my morning patrol, the drug dealer halfway confronted me as I walked to Scott 'n' Scott's house to see if I could give away the pot of flowers. I mean, I'm crazy about the flowers, but they'd probably die in my hands and it's the thought that counts...and what I was really excited about was the SEED, my word, 50,000 seeds in the Burpee Seed Shaker box, woooo! The very word "Burpee" brings back fond memories of gardening on our rural farm.

So, yeah, I was standing there in Scott's yard...holding a flower pot with lovely violas...and the same drug dealer from the night before (but now wearing a black jacket instead of his other quite distinctive jacket) walked by with a brown pit bull NOT ON A LEASH. The pit bull rushed toward me, but then the drug dealer called it back.

"Don't follow me, man," he snarled at me, but he had a pleading tone.

"I'm not following you, I'm going that way," I said, pointing toward Peter and Joy's house.

"Don't be following me," he said. "Don't be doing that (expletive for female anatomy) (expletive for posterior) (expletive for excrement). I respect you. You respect me."

"I'm not following you, sir," I said. And he continued down the block with his unleashed pit bull.

This is the same guy who, a couple days ago, said to me, "Those are just my friends I smoke weed with. You don't need to be calling 911 on me" as he got in a car that pulled up.

I know exactly what he's doing. And if I see him dealing on the corner, I'll keep calling 911, even if I'm just racking up calls for the stats.

Yeah, I know people complain (and rightly so) about 911 response time, but if you call the cops about a dealer or a prostitute after midnight, their response time is MUCH faster. And at 3 in the morning it can only be described as (expletive) QUICK.

Want to clean up your neighborhood while dealing with the notoriously slow police response time? Stay up until 3 in the morning. Drive around, if you must. Call in the prostitutes and the dealers. Do it. And if they don't respond, you're still racking up the stats.

But, you know, this is what happens when you call 911 on drug dealing on the North Side. The next day the drug dealer confronts you. With his pit bull. And there you stand, armed with a (expletive) pot of flowers.

Oh, excuse me. I have to say...it was a WONDERFUL pot of flowers.

Next I went to Peter and Joy's house to see if I could unload the violas like a lovely little foundling from my doorstep, but Joy didn't answer though her white minivan was parked out front.

So I went to the house of the older lady who wants to remain anonymous (see the Minn Post article) where I should have gone all along. Oh, the wonderfulness of this lady and her fantastic gardening efforts! She has a Polish accent, and given her age she must have been, in her lifetime, a witness to unspeakable horrors.

I met her during the "tour of progress" (which I will blog about shortly) when Kevin Gulden introduced me. The Older Lady Who Gardens told me her block was once the location of a big horse stables. This she had learned from her father, who acquired the information from older folks alive when she--the old woman--was just a girl.

(Yeah, she's been around that house a LONG TIME)

Sometimes, during those early years, they would be gardening (the woman and her father, together) and they'd find a horse shoe in the soil.

I put the pot of violas on her steps. And a few hours later, when Jacob the camera guy showed up to shoot yet more video for Minn Post, I saw the flower pot had moved into her side yard, and was sitting in a good and sunny location. Meanwhile, I made great use of the flower seeds to beautify "the problem child of the block" while Jacob shot video for Minn Post.

More on that later.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, there isn't another blog like this. Great stuff, keep it up. What else do you need at your place?

Trafficguy said...

JN,
I'm going to have a few bake sales up here in Victoryland and get you a digital camera WITH the ability to shoot movies.

Video clips of this sort of stuff are what we need to show folks stuff like what you are describing goes on EVERYDAY!

Uploading to YouTube is a breeze! If we can't shame the individuals buying/selling, then show the politicians (that have the muzzle on our police department) to do their job.

Uploading junk going on around your house may be a wakeup call to a lot of people. If it's on a public street..film it!

It would be interesting to see how a North Minneapolis "drug deal goes down." But hey, that's just me. I get a kick out of watching "COPS" on Saturday night.

Ranty said...

The problem with grass is that it needs to be watered regularly and maintained to keep it weed-free.

I strongly suggest hardy native perennials instead...

Oh, and I have been known to guerrilla-garden the yards of adjacent (vacant) homes in Willard-Hay myself - maybe you want to try that? I'm guessing you would encounter little resistence.

Johnny Northside said...

In response to the three of you...

OK, I'll take your word about the grass. Tell me specifically what you suggest using instead and I'll get it at Menards, unless somebody wants to drop it off. (Better not leave it on the steps, though...um, put it on the back deck. Heck, put it UNDER the back deck)

In regard to the digital camera...I can't accept something expensive like that. I'd be happy to USE it and give it back unless, of course, somebody knocks me flat on my butt and breaks it.

Could happen.

As for what else I need...

Ladder. More paint.

But most of all, what the North Side needs is for people to start doing the same stuff. Take charge of your block and the "perimeter" streets surrounding it, and a "corridor of safety" so folks can walk to the bus stop.

There is a memorial at the Hubert H. Humphrey Vets hospital, to the citizens who were on that plane that went down on 9/11, the one where the passengers fought the hijackers. One of the passengers said simply, "We're going to do something."

That's what we need to do. We need to do SOMETHING.

Make the phone calls that need to be made: 911, 311, real estate agents, etc. But we can, we MUST move faster ourselves to help these flawed systems work.

I'm always happy to see a Castrejon board replace my own boards. Their boards are better. But my boards can secure the place for 5 to 8 days until the "official" boards show up. That's 5 to 8 days the crack heads can't get inside to sleep, defecate, and smoke their dope.

If nobody can be found for a house, and the house is wide open for crack heads to take up residence, and Castrejon takes 5 or 6 days to show up...houses MUST be secure against crack heads.

Furthermore, the city has already made it clear it won't board up the second story windows except in the most extreme circumstances.

But if they're left open to the rain, pigeons, and trespassers who can climb on porch roofs, then your block will continue to degrade.

So I say "adopt" the house like the city said, and board the damn second story YOURSELF. Do it! The public officials seem to have left us to our own ends, at least a lot of the time. "Adopt the vacant houses" sounds a whole lot like "you're on your own, folks. Good luck with that. Be brave."

Yeah, the city said "adopt these houses." So take the city at its word and do the common sense thing. It's YOUR SAFETY which is at stake if crack heads take up residence right next to you, if weather gets into broken second story windows and the house rots until it collapses on its own GAS PIPES.

As you have your adventures securing your neighborhood, (what fun!) document those adventures and toss 'em out in the public eye. You can do it right here on this blog.

Comment sections are for the small stuff. Otherwise email me the longer, colorful tales for full-fledge blog entries. My email can be found at the bottom of the columns I write for the Minnesota Daily. (If I put it here, I'll get spammed)

Ranty said...

Um, just so we're clear, some other people ARE doing the same things you're doing.

They simply aren't getting as much attention as you.

kanoyes said...

Hey john,
more webmaster zen...
You should use your gmail account, it helps amazin with the spam stuff, your daily and university emails are going away when you leave those institutions anyway, the gmail is a longer term, near spamless solution to the email problem,plus gmail allows you to classify spam so you never get similar spam, and an easy delete all at once feature, plus and archiving feature that the daily and university emails do not have.. plus you need to get your email out there anyway....

Johnny Northside said...

To Karl: I prefer Yahoo. I went and got a new Yahoo account just recently, so I could use Flickr.com.

To Ranty, and all others: I couldn't agree more. I don't deserve so much attention when other folks have been doing the same thing. Ranty, I'd love to hear (and post) more details about your guerrilla-gardening efforts. (I'm quite the "guerrilla-composter" myself!)

Oh, trespassing! We're all just, like, TRESPASSING by planting pansies in abandoned yards!

In regard to getting so much attention for, like, putting up a few boards on my own initiative (and I *always* report the situation to 311) I think by being so BRAZEN and PUBLIC about it, perhaps I can help some good citizen efforts "come out of the closet."

We need the city to say, and quite explicitly, as follows:

"Yes, when we said 'adopt houses,' then clearly we meant a house with the front door kicked in needs to be secured until the guys with the official boards can get there five days later, especially if there's no easily-discovered way to contact an owner or a responsible party."

That's just common sense, like when you rush into a burning building without asking permission to enter.

Part of what I'm trying to do is shatter the all-too-common fear that, oh, gee, I'm TRESPASSING if I secure a house with a kicked-in front door wide open to trespass from and occupation by CRACK HEADS.

NO, YOU ARE BEING A GOOD CITIZEN. It's like rushing into a burning building only, in this case, you're trying to PREVENT it from burning to the ground from (oh gee, could it be?) crack heads cooking their crack inside.

My attention-getting blog would be the most effective if it's not merely my own story. So all you "guerrilla boarders" and "guerrilla gardeners" and "311 vigilantes" and "911 frequent fliers" feel free to come out of the closet...even if you have to use a nickname. But why should you have to?

One poster has already promised me, by email, her abridged history of personal North Side struggles and photos she takes of the "corner boys" dealing their dope and driving away potential new residents all the livelong day.

Which, I continue to assert, is the MAIN PROBLEM which needs to be addressed on the North Side. The (expletive) open air drug markets. That and assault, robbery, burglary.

What needs to be done? The cops should pull up with the police dogs, frequently, and sniff for the dope and ask the aggressive questions.

Oh, is that POLICE HARASSMENT?

(Here I address the corner boys)

YOU'RE STANDING ON A CORNER OF THE NORTH SIDE ALL DAY WITH THREE OF YOUR FRIENDS, JERKING YOUR HEAD TO PASSING CARS. WHAT THE (EXPLETIVE) DO YOU EXPECT OR DESERVE BUT A POLICE DOG, A PAT DOWN AND, JUST MAYBE, A RIDE TO JAIL?

Don't like it? Get a job. Can't get a job? Walk around picking up litter like a GOOD citizen. Hey, it's YOUR litter, anyway.

(End of address to "corner boys")

I can hardly wait to start posting pictures of the "corner boys" doing their thing. Because SOMEBODY has to stick their neck out.

So send me the pictures. Oh, and take some pictures of the prostitutes, too.

I haven't even gotten around to blogging about the "looking for a date?" encounter I had at 29th and Lyndale. Yeah, me, in my rusty Chevy Celebrity. Who knew what a "chick magnet" it really was? The North Side has made me 100 times more sexy, overnight!

Grad students, move to the North Side! You'll find yourself transformed overnight. Women standing on street corners will beg to jump in your car!

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I don't deserve all the attention and, furthermore, if my ability to write creates a hot blog, then all the better to share the blog space, my dears!

So send me the stories and photos, folks.

Everybody can see how I posted Steffanie M's story and gave it as much prominence as my own stories. (Even though I have no beef at all with the Mayor)

Well, I want to do a LOT more of that kind of thing. Those stories will be cooler than, oh, little ol' me, Johnny Northside, put a BOARD up today.

Whoop-dee-do. Yup, like you said, Ranty...lots of people do that. And have done it for a long time. Well, let the untold stories be told, I say!

And if people say, "To heck with that, I'm starting my own North Side blog" then just tell me the URL, and I'll promo it and link it from here. It's all good!

Whether here or on another blog, the internet makes us strong and can help us turn the tide on the North Side. Blog until your fingers bleed.

Whew.

Hey, I really did LOVE the flowers! But that dear sweet older lady's greatest joy in life is her garden, and so I thought it was best to let her take care of them, while I concentrate on the wonderful box of seeds.

Anonymous said...

Johnny,

I'm not sure if you are aware of this but in Hennepin County at the Solid Waste and Recycling Drop offs in Brooklyn Park and Bloomington they used to give away paint that people drop off.

http://wwwa.co.hennepin.mn.us/portal/site/HCInternet/menuitem.3f94db53874f9b6f68ce1e10b1466498/?vgnextoid=3de3c95fa29fc010VgnVCM1000000f094689RCRD

Most of it is white and gray. you might want to call its been a few years since I was down there so they might have changed policies.