Friday, May 8, 2009

JNS BLOG EXCLUSIVE: "The Devil" Is Being Exorcised From 3020 6th St. N.

Photo By John Hoff

Word comes from a highly-placed and reliable source as follows: CitiMortgage no longer owns 3020 6th St. N. Somehow, they managed to unload that sucker on Deutschebank, which now owns this notorious Pandora's box of drug and prostitution evil, located in the very heart of our planned Eco Village utopia, THE NECESSARY FINAL PIECE IN THE PUZZLE OF OUR MASTER PLAN!!!!

CURSES!!!!

There is good news, however....

The current owner, Deutschebank, and the current servicer, American Home Mortgage Servicing, are working closely and cooperatively with the Hawthorne Neighborhood Council to remain within the letter of the law while actively achieving the goal of throwing the crackhead scum out in the street. Legally.

This is my characterization, and not that of my source, who would never say "crackhead scum," even off the record, but would remain polished and professional.

This is what the people need to know: everything is going well. Have faith. Urban utopia is just around the corner and we've already seen two months with NO REPORTED CRIME in the Eco Village. With 3020 6th St. N. soon going down, now is the time for home owners to buy, buy, buy in the area near 3020 6th St. N.

6 comments:

Jordan Neighbor said...

hmmmm this is not the first house I have heard that ended up in possession of that german bank. Is it that common of a bank or is there maybe more to it???

Dottie?? Didn't one up near you end up with this bank?

Jeanie Hoholik said...

What a pretty picture of this house, John!

Dottie said...

Deutsche Bank has bought quite a few North Minneapolis properties. As of December, they owned 8 in Jordan. Not a huge number, but still significant. And yes, at one point, they owned one or more of the properties on my block before the city took them over.

1915bung said...

Deustsche Bags owned my home before I bought it.

Jordan Neighbor said...

LOL @ 1915!!!

Anonymous said...

Run Devil Run!

But... how's "The Devil" doing at his other (new) property??? A little birdie told me that he's keeping his head nice and low in an attempt to keep off the radar... But Mr. Haymon should remember if you don't pay your bills (or fees or dues or taxes, etc.) there are consequences.

I wonder if he's brought it up to code yet? There's an awful lot of permits that should be pulled...